Asus says they will unlock my bootloader for ...money.

Even trying to buy anything from them directly is damn near impossible. Tried purchasing a desktop from their website a few weeks back, and the system wouldn't accept my address as valid. I talked to their support team, they told me they have to escalate it and I'd hear back in 24-48 hours.

Never heard back. Ended up going through Lenovo, and that was painless.

I used to almost exclusively recommend Asus or Lenovo to my family and friends, but I guess its just Lenovo now.