I mean, it might legit be more comfortable to wipe with a pinecone or stinging nettle. So take that humble brag as you will, but sometimes the grass isn't cushier on the other cheek.
Yeah, used to love bidets, then I sat down drunk and accidentally nudged it full blast full cold. The hemorrhoids I got the next day were brutal. So now I use tp cause the worst that can happen while drunk is I need to wash my hand a bit more thoroughly than usual....