Why do people around me tend to increase their responsibility load (i.e. have children, become a manager, do charity, etc.) while I (30M) try to avoid it as much as I can?
The only reason a lot of people chase the career side is the money. That’s why there’s a lot of shit managers shirking responsibility. They get up high enough to live comfortably and flip into people who do as little as possible. Drives me bonkers since I seem to be stuck with this desire for things to be efficient that I can’t turn off and these people drag everything down
Parenting is usually an accident or a pressure trap from family/society/religion. Also a tad of biological drive overriding sense.
Charity though. That can be a hobby that is quite rewarding. It’s also something you can walk away from and back into pretty easily depending on what you do so it’s low stress if you want it to be. It takes up time and turns off the sensation you aren’t doing anything. I tend towards physical labor kinds of charity like park cleanups and river dredges and mulching playgrounds and stuff since it’s mostly just a different kind of exercise
Then explain declining birth rates in younger generations without talking about financial pressures outweighing societal, familial, and religious pressures.
I don’t consider that an accident, lol. A condom breaking or not functioning normally is an accident. Not using one because you don’t want to discuss it is a choice.
pretty much. capitalism is incompatible with human biology and the continued existence of the human race, and I didn't even mention the environment yet
It's easy to say: "other people do things because of pressure, I do things because I want to." But that kinda oversimplifies free will, power dynamics, and other similar concepts. Why is charity rewarding to you? Because someone gave you a pat on the back? Couldn't we boil it all down to extrinsic motivators? Some people might not feel good "giving away" their time to charity. You don't feel good having kids. It's all perspective.
Re the actual topic on why take on more responsibility. My argument is I pick charity work that doesn’t really equate to responsibility. I’m there when I’m there and I’m not when I’m not. It’s not like kids where once you turn it on, turning it off is probably a crime, or work where dialing back after you moved up is fucking someone over
I could see the career side for the fulfillment - I left a higher paying job for a lower paying one but work more hours because I’m genuinely more mentally challenged and I find that enjoyable.