Trump false reply to question about keeping jobs in US: "I was honored as the man of the year. Maybe 20 years ago. The fake news heard about it and said, it never happened…"
Hear me out. Let's tell him he already won the election, and we're even bumping the inauguration just for him, because his work will be so important. We make him a cardboard set of the Oval Office (painted gold everything) with a nice chair and desk, and a TV that only plays old Fox News clips about him. Staffers regularly bring random papers for him to sign. Mostly Del Taco orders.
And then we never have to hear about his stupid ass ever again.
They have "dementia villages", just fill it with Trump flags and have him give a speech every couple days to an audience of people who will forget what happened in 5 minutes.