Mental illnes of former teacher

Happend 10 years ago.

When I was in 7th grade my teacher was late. So me and some other people sat at the computer and did dumb shit. Then one person has the idea to look for a weapon online shop. I tiped it in and the second I clicked one a website the teacher came in (yea I know fucking stupid, but I was a kid). He reacted realy strangely. He asked me if everything was OK and if I had problems at home and stuff like that. So realy extreme stuff for just a dumb kid googleing to much. But not at all judgy, more concerned. At the time I didn't think much of it.

Two years later he killed himself. Nobody saw it comming, because he always looked happy. Apparently he had depression and already had it for years. And after that it kicked in my head. Two years earlier he asked me those questions because that's what he felt. He was concerned that I felt what he felt and wanted to help me get the help he would have needed.

I still think of this regularly and it makes me realy sad. Mental illness is a bitch.