It has occurred to me that Vulcan must have some form of sex industry to handle those going through Pon Farr who aren't currently married or otherwise involved. Otherwise, they'd have constant issues with violence from those suffering the "blood fever" whose spouse was far away, or had died, or for some other reason had no one to mate with.
Given Vulcan attitudes towards sex, it's probably kept out of sight, and is only "officially" available to those experiencing their "Seven Year Itch," but it has to exist, right?
I always got the impression that Vulcan society operated similar to traditional Japanese or other societies where couples were "arranged" by families. Not sure about the one off cases though so maybe there is some kind of sex industry given the physiological toll if it's not addressed in time
It does seem to be primarily on an arranged marriage system, but there are plenty of exceptions. Pairings that don't come together for some reason, partners that die either due to age or accident, etc.
As I recall on Voyager with a little coaxing Tuvok was able to use the holodeck to get "relief" so I'd imagine the same goes for most vulcans who might be on long away missions
I'm not sure that it is. Voyager likely only went with the holodeck solution because they were stranded in the delta quadrant, and no other alternatives were available.
Within the Federation, a Vulcan who felt the Ponn Farr would take leave, like Spock tried to do, or couples would try to serve on the same ship/station together to minimise issues.