Instance which defederates no one and isn't defederated by anyone?

Is there an instance which does not block any other instance and isn't blocked by any instance?

I would like to decide myself who I block and who not.

I am currently on lemmy.ml and I noticed they block quite a few instances ( https://lemmy.ml/instances ).

I would like to make this decision by myself.

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You might find a few, but it's not really possible long term. Either you block instances that are run by fascists or child abusers, or you get blocked by instances for allowing that on your server.