Out of Office

Or he's dead.
- Me, dead, deleting all my social media to make it a big mystery or something.
  
  The majority of men showed changes in behavior before the suicide, especially social withdrawal,
  Source: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC10488060/
- That happened to a friend of mine. He deleted everything when he had a mental health episode. Took time off. They found his remains months later.
  So yeah, could be.
- Livin the dream.
  
  Just minus the "livin" part. But hey, can't have everything.

Take two weeks vacation. Get paid.
Miss two weeks of work. Get paid.
Get fired. Get two weeks severance and unemployment.
Homie quit and got six weeks pay plus unemployment benefits.
- Prob aren't getting severance nor unemployment if you get fired for 2 weeks of no-call-no-show.
  
  Severance, you're right. Unemployment is likely still on the table depending on the state. In Texas, the person can file for unemployment. The company can challenge saying they were a no show but the employee can argue that it isn't true. It is just easier to allow unemployment to just cover it.
  EDIT: I once had a guy work for two week as a 1099 and he still filed for unemployment. That got denied because he was never an actual employee, but had we not noticed the claim in the mail, he would have gotten paid.
- Why would he get paid for not showing up for 2 weeks, at least when I went on parental leave I had to talk to HR every week I didn't work and ask them to use my sick time, even then they'd forget and I'd have to remind them before the week was off otherwise I wouldn't get a check
  
  Salaried employees get paid by default. Someone has to notify accounting to not pay the person, not the other way around. This has been the process for every company I have ever worked for, or owned. I am not saying that what you are saying isn't true, I am saying that it is fucked up.

I quit my startup like that.
We were making it: we were eking by and just starting to turn the corner when one of the partners did some legal wrangling to grab power. FineYouDoIt.jpg because I'd had enough already and prepped my next job.
Hopped a plane. Hopped another. Hopped another. Three people on the planet knew where I was: Mom, GF, and guy who bashes bags at the local airport who saw my name on the flight manifest and checked my connection. Went to the waiting apartment to start the next day. Never looked back, didn't answer email except when Cop friend emailed and asked whether I was missing. Nope, so case closed.
- Wait, so you just bailed on your girlfriend?
  
  I'm curious about that too
  
  No he's just gone to the store for cigarettes.
- But why
  
  Step one in his plan of stealing the declaration of Independence
  
  He said he just had enough

or dead
- I used to fantasize about doing this.
  When it got to a point that I was making careful plans for how to effectively remove all traces of my existence before walking into the sea or something, I realized that it was probably not a good thing that I was fixating on this "fantasy" and how attractive it was becoming, so I went to a nice little family mental health clinic in walking distance.
  I was diagnosed with depression, PTSD and general anxiety disorder. A few years and a few rounds of therapy and medication later and I'm... still struggling. But at least I'm not planning my exit. There's a lot to live for, but you can't see it when your brain starts running away with your mental narratives. Don't ruminate, don't fantasize. Get some help and do something new with your lives.
  
  I'm in a similar situation. I recognize the planning of my exit. I used to do that in the past. Or well. Maybe it's not all in my past yet. But I'm doing my best.
  All the best to you.
  
  Good ideas, all around. I'm glad you didn't walk into the sea. I have walked through that dark place myself and it led me to get a therapist who knew exactly what that was like. I learned how to help myself. It's been ten years since then.
  
  Meh, I find recognizing I have that ability is actually calming and snaps me out of the depression a bit.
- Is that not "living the dream"?
  
  Deading the dream?
- Suicide then, unlikely anyone else could delete all his social media.

Living the dream from the bottom of the Tiber river.

Interesting that this is "Livin the dream". It happened at my friend's workplace and the leading theory is that he did some diddling and is escaping the repercussions. Guess it's a fine line...
- Cheated on his wife. Kid diddler. Embezzlement.
  They're never as juicy as people like to think it is. It's usually something lame like depression or raising diddlers.
  
  Depression and raising toddlers can both be the result of ill-advised diddling
  
  "raising diddlers"?

I worked at a restaurant as a teen. One of the managers went to Hawaii for vacation and never came back. Food service jobs are not hard to find. The bartender he was occasionally fucking was pretty unhappy because he didn't even tell her or call.
- Every time I've gone to a beautiful place, (Kauai/Virgin Islands/Moab etc) I've run into former insurance salesman types who just said fuck it, and stayed, and now live in an old school bus and fix outboards or whatever. Often it was precipitated by a big life event like a divorce or a child leaving the nest but sometimes they just bounced. I get it.
  
  Makes me wish my career wasn't so fucking niche, for sure

You sure he didn't get kidnapped or run out of money?

What to do if you win the lottery 101

He dead

I've had some coworkers that would have made my life better if they'd f'ed off to Italy and never come back.

I, too, fantasize about my coworkers wondering where I am, cue comedy smash cut to my slowly swinging corpse
If/when I do kms it won't be by hanging but it's a funnier mental image
- That's nothing to joke about.
  Get help!
  Suicide prevention hotlines: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/suicide/suicide-prevention-hotlines-resources-worldwide
  
  That’s nothing to joke about.
  Like hell it isn't. For some of us, joking about these things are how we stave them off.
  
  On antidepressants and in therapy, which is why I am still here. It is funny, though. Imagine it:
  Scene: several people are sitting in a zoom call, with cameras on. It's dead silent.
  Coworker 1: Should we just get started?
  Coworker 2: Probably, pix's missed the other meetings today too, I doubt they'll show up now.
  Coworker 3: I'm starting to get pretty sick of them being so unreliable. I hope whatever they're doing instead of at least letting us know they won't be here is important.
  Hard cut to my torso and legs, neck and head out of frame, gently swinging suspended above the ground
  This continues for a couple seconds, letting the shock factor linger, before the Seinfeld outro slap bass starts playing

Living the dream or not living anymore, we'll never know
- This post is actually scary. Probably should get in touch with the embassy or something and get a courtesy check done on him?
  
  If he, or the mafia doesn't want him to be found, there's not much you can do.
  But in all seriousness: yeah, when someone is missing they should be reported as such at the local police, who can contact the embassy's office in the country they were going on holiday. Many parts of Italy are very safe, rich, modern. But there are also parts where you will get hurt, especially as a tourist. Loads of poverty, gangs, mafia, corruption (particularly the south).

Something similar happened to a coworker of mine a long time ago. This girl I used to work with, Adriana, her boyfriend, Christopher, called us at work one day one said that she went on vacation and she just never came back. It was a shame too because the guy died in a car crash like a year later. I saw it on the news.
- “What are you cryin’ for?”
- Who ish dish?

He's been sleeping on my couch, smoking weed all day. Plz take him back

This dude is playing 4D chess while we’re sitting here pulling on our puds

Who hasn't watched "Searching for Italy" and thought, "Yeah, Italy's fucking awesome! I could totally make it there!"?
- eh, you can make it, but life's not that comfortable here
  
  It's not bad if you have money. Southern Italy is getting pretty toasty, though.
  
  Can you define that? For me, all I really care about is A/C and an internet connection
  
  You've been holding out on us! Please upload some pictures of beautiful Italy.
- Technically you could “make it” anywhere.

My dad did this to an asshole client. Fucked his practice up lol.

A guy at work did something like that. Went on vacation for a week, just never returned. Didn't return phone calls or emails. Eventually he popped up on social media about 6 months later and some coworkers spotted him and got the story. If I remember correctly (which I may not), I think his girlfriend convinced him to stay, so he did, and he just ghosted his job.
- That's the dream

moved to somewhere with healthcare instead of health control

Livin the dream.
I love that. You know what? I will have some meatloaf.
\
- You took the words right out of my mouth.

Or maybe he died.

I did something close to this, not as far as corsican though.
I booked a holiday for feb, and I gave my notice that my leaving would kick in just before.
- I burned myself out at a startup about 20 years ago. Walked into my bosses office & told him I quit. Was on the other side of the planet a few days later. I did eventually return home though.

I seriously almost did this. I visited the Netherlands, and fell absolutely head over heels for their way of life. It's so damn peaceful and free! You don't have to worry about getting shot when you're running errands. You don't have to worry about going bankrupt through medical expenses. You don't have to worry about going to jail over weed or mushrooms. You don't have to buy a car, because bicycling infrastructure and public transportation is AMAZING.
While I was there I met a lovely chap who is originally from England. He told me that he spent a holiday in Amsterdam, and broke his leg. So he stayed at the hospital, and afterwards, just didn't leave. He's been working/living there ever since.
When it came time for me to leave, I had accidentally missed my train, and it was going to be some extra money to switch around my flight/train to get back home, and a part of me was seriously considering just being like "fuck it" and staying. The only thing stopping me from moving there now is the knowledge that I'd have to continue paying taxes to the U.S. if I wanted to keep my citizenship while living and paying taxes in the Netherlands. 😑
If anyone can tell me a way around this... please do, because I want to move to the Netherlands.
- I am Dutch but moved to England (for love) 16 years ago and I have never regretted it. Do it while you can, else you will just live with the regret. It is such a life experience moving countries, there is no way to describe it. The magical feeling that you have in the beginning does disappear a little over the years, but it never leaves completely. The memories you create are just so amazing that you will never lose the magical feeling entirely.
  Just. Do. It.
- Look at Foreign Earned Income Exclusion and Foreign Tax Credit

peopleroni