"Lots of people don't know this but my genius uncle at MIT knew. And he told me. if you wanna fry something frozen really fast - you can just put the ice in the super hot oil pool. See if I—"
To protect the president - the Secret Service leaps into action and knocks the ice bag from Trump's arms and wrestles it to the ground.
Trump glares at them and keeps talking "What is it? What is it called? The super hot oil pool. Plasmaoil? Yeah, plasmaoil. Like the sun - so strong."
I wish they had made him flip burgers instead, or maybe stand on the assembly station? Fries are so unexciting.
I would have paid money for someone to milkshake bomb him, too. Maybe that's why nobody seemed to be ordering drinks.... Secret service working overtime to protect our big boy from IED's (improvised explosive drinks)
Fries are exciting to me. I think almost everybody's flipped something to get it cooked on both sides, but an actual restaurant-grade fryer could cost me forearm skin if I don't know what I'm doing, and I don't.
I'm no lawyer so I wonder if a bioweapon attack automatically leads to more jail time.
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Seriously though - if somebody milkshaked Trump - the libs would be up in arms about the "violence". The correct way to deal with fascists is to win arguments against them.
I don't think anyone believes that this stunt was meant to appeal to service workers. If you watch the stream, Trump interacts with people as if he is walking around a zoo. It's poverty tourism. The stunt is meant to appeal to people who enjoy poverty tourism. The stunt is meant to normalize treating service workers as if they are not humans. This is what appeals to many Americans.
that said I do think it is genuinely meant to appeal to (or rather pander to) service workers as per the campaign, just like going into local businesses and engaging with the staff, and hand-shaking with unions, etc. that politicians always do. These people are just incapable of selling it. I think this event is a strategized Republican attempt shake off some of the 'elitist' vibe that is so alienating about both parties, but that the Democrats being unashamed about is a point of Republican attack against them (and the Trump campaign picking up reactionary unions and talking about "jobs" all the time and how 'Democrats outsourced and ruined all the jobs' is part of this strategy and trajectory). It's just that Trump is a billionaire --- they are incapable of treating other humans like full people, even other rich. Just like Hillary was incapable of not acting aghast at working class living conditions. That wasn't the goal of the event, but it's who she is, in the class to which she belongs.
The fact that he is fucking up fry station doesn't give me hope. I was a crew trainer in high school, and I would have sent him to clean the bathrooms for botching the fries that badly. This is the most work he's ever done in his life.
Lots of people don't know this but Trump is more illeist than Rickey Henderson and Trump stole more bases when he played in the major leagues. It's true. It's true.
I can already hear a r/politics redditor intoning.
Look, InevitableSwing, you're not helping. Okay? You're not. You said "Fuck royalty," but have you considered Kamala's outreach towards monarchists is timely being that it's just weeks before the election? She needs every vote she can get in the swing states. That's a fact. And, furthermore, "Fuck Dick Cheney"? My - aren't you clever? Again - consider the swing states. Dick Cheney might not be your cup of tea and he's not mine either but he's important because...
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And I reply with "Verywet fart noise". About an hour later I'm temporarily for four weeks banned for "incivility".