A Comic Wherein I Would Rather Be Playing Slay the Spire

Ok. The guy is crazy with his kids. Whatever the kids imagine, thats the game. My niece once told me we were playing "Twinkle Spiral". Then we held out our arms spin in a circle while running around the room spinning. It's been 10 years, and apperently I won. I still have no idea what the game even was.

The cat he's just being lazy. You put some double sided sticky take down on the floor in the shape of a maze. Then you keep the toy upwards, so the cat is always looking up. Now you guide the cat so she never looks down, and navigates the maze while not stepping on the tape.

And his wife? Well she's just a prude. A card based system could TOTALLY spice up the bedroom. Oh, you drew this card. Lets see what you gotta do. Looks like you're getting tied up and tickled for 10 minutes. Ok, my turn to draw a card. Looks like I gotta lick your butthole until you cum.....and you're still tied up, so you can't help! Ohh nooooooooo..........slurp slurp slurp

100% accurate username
- Guy is at +14 for me, even though I dish out plenty of negatives as well.
- I love a good hard left

He can buy a deck of spicy cards for the wife, and I'm sorry for the kids. But the cat? Is there a creature more roguelike than a cat?

Trash Panda?
- Best part is they can keep eating the same food you were buying for the cat in the first place.

Honestly, it’s really good. As are Balatro (roguelike poker-like) and Fights in Tight Spaces (John Wick fight scene deckbuilder roguelike)

I haven't heard of Fights in Tight Spaces, but I'll check it out.
I slept on Slay the Spire for years because the description of it sounded so good it was like the developers were reading my diary, and I wasn't ready for that.
- LOL. “The game you, yes specifically you, were born to play”. Psyched for the sequel, not going to lie

Slay the Spire lasted most of my flight to Japan a couple years ago. On the deck it's extremely battery efficient.

I bought it on my phone over the summer when we lost power for a week (I live in Texas). I couldn't consistently charge my phone, but Slay the Spire offered a much needed distraction for hours.

Wish I understood and enjoyed these card battle games. There are a number of really good ones available.

As in, understanding the appeal, or understanding how to properly play? StS is what taught me the latter, it might be a good fit (with some beginners tips if you'd like).
- Understanding how to play. The only one I’ve tried is Enscryption and I was mostly lost. Any beginners tips would be appreciated.

No idea what "Slay the Spire" is so I had to look it up:

https://www.nintendo.com/us/store/products/slay-the-spire-switch/

Cartoon makes more sense now!

It's on pretty much every platform, including GOG for those who want DRM-free, and even has a native Linux version.
It also goes on sale quite frequently for like 66% off. Definitely worth picking up at sale price.
- It also goes on sale quite frequently for like 66% off. Definitely worth picking up at sale price.
  For anyone already using using these services its also included in both Game Pass and PS+ Extra at the moment.
Wow, that's pretty incredible that it hadn't reached you all these years. Slay the Spire's predecessor is Dream Quest, which, in combination with the tabletop card game Dominion, spawned a whole subgenre of deck-building games.
Indies' Lies, Pirates Outlaws, Monster Train, Tainted Grail: Conquest, Griftlands, and so many more are all direct descendants of StS. It was as revolutionary to indie gaming as FTL: Faster Than Light and Doukutsu Monogatari (Cave Story) were in their respective genres.
So there's a little bit of indie gaming history for you.
- Yeah, I don't have the energy to sift through 500 garbage indie games to find the one gem. ;) As a rule, I don't bother with indie titles.

Replace it with Balatro

No, for three reasons.
There ain't no Slaying, there ain't no Spires, and there ain't no Slaying of no Spires.

I used to watch a YouTuber absolutely demolish every run and I would learn about the mechanics and their strategies but I somehow kept getting stomped in 4/5 runs myself.

It could just be the RNG but it was pretty demoralizing.

Was it live streaming or pre-recorded? I'm coming to realize that most pre-recorded roguelike videos are cherry-picked and don't teach you much.
- The WR is a 18 win streak on rotating characters on A20. There's players just that good.
I gotta assume it was Baarlorlord. It gets really frustrating when you realise hes playing on Ascension 20.

I put on my robe and wizard hat.

I put 100 hours into this before I gave it up. The luck mechanics just drove me up the wall; I could be having a great run and suddenly the whole thing falls apart because of bad luck.

I prefer to make my own luck. Which I can't.

To be honest I have considered getting a deck of cards with various positions, to save the effort of having to make decisions in the moment. 🤔