Anon's split personality

Annon needs to wash his right hand

I just can't fathom how that happens, after cooming all that I want to do is cuddles and kisses ?? Ride the endorphins high together..

I think it means he's not really that into her but just gets horny for her.
- I guess.. But I don't have sex anymore so idk 🤷

Skill issue. My gf is always perfect

It might be more related to the pizza slice than anything else. Some guys get extraordinarily hangry. Sex is exhausting. He should prepare more food for afterwards.

POS...probably a future cop

I've heard similar takes resolved with "this person is venomously sexist, but straight." Once their sexual needs are met, the one thing they want out of a partner is done, it's back to absolutely loathing women.

Sounds like a nightmare, tbh.

Yeah reading this as a woman is low key terrifying like… if you hate me why tf do you want to fuck me? The idea a person could be so wildly two faced because they’re desperately trying to interact with me in my most vulnerable state is so scary, things like this is why women choose the bear
This reads like one step away from a DV situation
- if you hate me why tf do you want to fuck me?
  Testosterone is a hell of a drug. I've known a few guys who have had at least one gf they only stayed with for the sex and were just putting up with her the rest of the time. Those...generally aren't very good or healthy relationships. Most of them eventually get out of that mindset and (at least try to) find someone they like being with first and also want to fuck besides.
  But then my wife acts shocked that a bunch of women she works with talk like they don't even like their husbands. All I can think is why marry them then?
- I imagine sexism like this morphs into DV given time and opportunity
- Yeah it's definitely testosterone :/ just pure monkey brain neuron activated, there's not really any thoughts besides "I am so unbelievably in love with them" until you're snapped back to reality...

Believe it or not, straight to therapy.

try therapy

Gay: anon had sex with a woman and hated it

Fake: anon had sex
- Open and shut case.

I'm like this. I fucking hate people. I don't want to be around them. I find so many things they do annoying. Being around others for too long makes me irritable, anxious and exhausted. But some part of me is hard coded for human interaction. If I'm away from people for too long I get depressed and lonely and crave companionship. Once I've spent enough time around someone, I've had enough and want to be separate from everyone again. Usually 1 day a week where I have a lengthy interaction (3 to 8 hours) with one or more people is ideal for me. 2 weeks without interaction and I feel like shit, more than one day a week and I start wanting to not be around people when I am around them. I don't think anon is sexist. But they should probably be honest with their girlfriend. Maybe they'd be happier in a less committed relationship.

you should have been born as aristocrat in victorian era England. they used to build separate bedrooms for couples. such an insightful arrangement, lost to time... 😔

Fake: everything until the linebreak

Gay: everything after the linebreak

I know a ton of gay woman who would not agree with anything after the line break thus it is not gay.
- how could one analyse the gayness of a post on 4chan, a platform notoriously dominated by the presence of men, from the viewpoint of a woman?

Uh, anon, vaginas aren't supposed to be washed. That disrupts the microbiome and can lead to infections.

Well unwashed for round 2 is kinky
I... am fairly sure he means 'unwashed' in the sense of 'impure', aka, 'not a virgin'.
Still awful, but... that's how I read this...?
He could also mean both the more literal and more metaphorical meanings simultaneously.
Not sure.
It isn't washed with soap, but it is washed with water
- Vulvas can be washed with water and unscented, mild soap if tolerated but not vaginas, they are self-cleaning.
  https://www.healthline.com/health/how-to-clean-your-vagina
  https://www.self.com/story/best-way-to-clean-vagina
Self cleaning ovens hahahha
What other parts aren't meant to be washed? Asking for a friend.
- Eyeballs are self-cleaning as well.
- Believe it or not, belly buttons. At most you're only supposed to wash them once per month. Any more than that and you risk an infection due to imbalance in the microbes in there
it could have been his point
Why wife uses a bidet and soap, every single use. She's never had a UTI or any other issue down there. Explain.
- I can't explain that tbh. Would you like me to have a look???
  I'm trying my hardest to picture how one would attempt to wash a vagina with a bidet, and the only conclusion I'm getting here that makes any sense is that you probably don't even know what a vagina is.
  Here's a little hint for all you confused straight boys: the vagina is the hole, and the bits on the outside are collectively referred to as the vulva. For most of you reading this, the only practical application of this knowledge you'll ever get is maybe leaving slightly more anatomically correct comments in the replies to a greentext, but who knows?
- I think you mean her vulva. It's fine, good even, to wash the outside bits (though every time you pee seems hella excessive, like OCD levels of excessive) the vagina is the inside part.
- Explanation: Luck. Just pure good luck. Biology is messy, results for one aren't the same for all. It does however increase the chances of an infection, regardless of whether she's ever had a UTI from this practice.
Someone hasn't had a girlfriend
- Ok buddy, you're allowed to refer to yourself in first person here.
Yeah just let the jizz stew there naturally
- I love greentext communities on lemmy because it's the exact sort of place where you can effortlessly bait the most bitchless men ever to have existed into confidently stating they don't know how vaginas work 💅💅💅
- Toss in some celery, carrots, onions, salt, and a heavy grind of fresh pepper for a spicy UTI.

Anon should be dumped, or break up and find someone he likes. Or just find friends with benefits, or an escort?

He should find a therapist.
- Actually might not be a bad idea

I am Jack's complete lack of surprise.

The first half, because of testosterone.

The second half, because of prolactin.

It's not really that simple, but it's part of it. And I'm not a doctor.

No, and no. Not even just "not that simple". You're dead wrong. That's like saying I got from home to work because of "wheel". It's involved but it does not drive the show
- Are you going to provide an explanation you think is more correct? Some kind of correction, or citation, or just say "you're wrong" without further comment?
After coming I don't want sex again but I don't magically find my partner disgusting and annoying... we just cuddle.
- Ye, same here. My opinion of them also doesn't change before or after sex. Well, perhaps my opinion how good they are in bed

Anon discovers he might be gay

To quote Neil Patrick Harris- “yes, I’m gay. Gay for that pussy. “
-Neil Patrick Harris
Quote attributable to one Neil Patrick Harris. His friends call him Neil. I’m not allowed to call him Neil.
- And won’t you know, he turned out to be gay for dick
No they didn't. If they were gay they wouldnt be really into having sex with their girlfriend in the first place.
Anon is another misogynistic straight guy.
- But there are no straight men on 4chan
Anon is so into vag she must be a lesbian then
- All Anons are males. And gay.

Evolution anon

This is actually an interesting insight into a severily bipolar mind of a person

Is that really what bipolar is like?
- Absolutely not
- Not really so far as I understand it. "Bipolar swings" are more commonly on a week-month timescale.
- When people say bipolar they mean borderline. The person in the green text would be borderline