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  • Saturday Night Live actually had a good sketch about this a few weeks ago:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JYqfVE-fykk

    Washington: "We fight for a nation where we choose our own laws... choose our own leaders... and choose our own systems of weights and measures.

    I dream that one day, our proud nation will measure weights in pounds, and that 2000 pounds shall be called a ton."

    Rebel: "And what will 1000 pounds be called sir?"

    Washington: "Nothing. Cause will have no word for that."

    ...

    Washington: "Distance will be measured in inches, feet, yards and miles. 12 inches to a foot!"

    Rebel: "12 feet to a yard..."

    Washington: "If only it were so simple. 3 feet to a yard."

    Rebel: "And how many yards to a mile?"

    Washington: "Nobody knows."

    Rebel: "Ok, how many feet to a mile?"

    Washington: "5280, of course! It's a simple number that everyone will remember."

  • Beer was the only drink you could get in prole pubs. The proles were supposed not to drink gin, though in practice they could get hold of it easily enough. The game of darts was in full swing again, and the knot of men at the bar had begun talking about lottery tickets. Winston's presence was forgotten for a moment. There was a deal table under the window where he and the old man could talk without fear of being overheard. It was horribly dangerous, but at any rate there was no telescreen in the room, a point he had made sure of as soon as he came in.

    "E could 'a drawed me off a pint,' grumbled the old man as he settled down behind a glass. 'A 'alf litre ain't enough. It don't satisfy. And a 'ole litre's too much. It starts my bladder running. Let alone the price.'

    'You must have seen great changes since you were a young man,' said Winston tentatively.

    The old man's pale blue eyes moved from the darts board to the bar, and from the bar to the door of the Gents, as though it were in the bar-room that he expected the changes to have occurred.

    'The beer was better,' he said finally. 'And cheaper! When I was a young man, mild beer -- wallop we used to call it -- was fourpence a pint. That was before the war, of course.'

    -1984

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