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Cue Baulders Gate dice roll
Insight check: 18.
You are able to tell that God was lying.
Failed:
After trying to kill multiple innocent people while gambling with his right hand angel, God drowns all of humanity during a temper tantrum.
You find yourself on a ship filled with one family and two of each animal.Unfortunately, you have been chosen to host all the parasites and diseases so they will survive the flood.
Make a constitution roll.
Save failed.
You now live for 60 years instead of 2000.
Oh, and heavens gates are now closed.Well that certainly seems like a proportionate punishment for eating some fruit.
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