What these red cows from Texas have to do with war and peace in the Middle East

The majority of South Park jokes are firmly planted in reality. Their writing staff is brilliant.

If only today there was a rotund asshole that had people follow him around, then he farts in their mouths....ohh wait

Yeps. It is part of the Messianic prophecies that come from the parts of the OT that deal with the temple. Really try to make this short

There was a prophet who said the David line would rule forever and eventually would build a third temple after the second would fall. The second fell and so far there hasn't been a third. The original temple sought a perfect red haired cow for their rituals. So by religious logic all people have to do is find a red cow and it's time to rebuild the temple. But wait what about David? Ok well Paul said Jesus was of the David line and that he was king. That means anyone following Jesus is following the orders of the king of the David line. Therefore to be a good Christian you should go get a red cow and convince all the Jews to go to Israel so they can die in combat.

Oh and I forgot how they worked it out in terms of weird logic but the person who would find the cow is supposed to be not-jewish for some reason.

Religion, it really is this stupid and horrible.