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chapotraphouse @hexbear.net tombruzzo [none/use name] @hexbear.net 7 mo. ago

You're a big strong American? Drink this cold glass of tap water without complaining about the lack of flavour

100 comments

Lack of flavor? You obviously have never tasted the bouquet of flavor that is poor quality tap water in
- Mhyes top notes of benzene and unctuous mouthfeel
  
  Mmmm old lead pipe flavour, the best
- I love trace amounts of uranium in my water supply
- Biggest reason Americans avoid water is how shitty it tastes from tap in so many places
  
  Florida worst, Appalachia best
- America’s Amaro
This is cruel. The cold would hurt them because teeth are luxury bones so all American teeth are very sensitive.
- Teeth are luxury bones even in a lot of countries with universal healthcare, like Australia and the UK.
  
  Canada
I can't there's lead in it.
- That's flavor
  
  It's carcinolicious!
Ok
- still can't believe he didn't even drink it
  
  like, get fake 'local tap water' and drink it, or you know, just drink one actual fucking sip, you aren't going to instantly die from one sip as a 50 year old man
  
  I prefer to think about the deranged brainstorming sessions they had. "If i gulp the water, people will call it staged! If I sip too little they'll say I didn't drink enough. Alright, I'll split the difference and do the worst possible option: not drink the water AND go for a "tiny baby sip" look. That way I look like a total asshole"
  
  Classic obungler bungling drinking water
  
  Permanently Deleted
To be fair most American tapwater is poisoned
- This is not true. Most American cities have clean tap water.
  
  The idea that most American tap water is poisoned is a myth propagated by bottled water companies.
  
  Clean tap water is a luxury that most of the world does not have. You should enjoy it while it's still here.
  
  Can back this up. It's even a joke among New Yorkers that their tap water is almost magical. However, this is very much a mixed bag, as we can see with Flint.
  
  Ok, fair enough. I'm not American so I guess I had been given that impression by stories about Flint.
  
  Additionally, American bottled water comes from the exact same municipal supply that tap water comes from, they just charge an extra 2000% mark up for adding extra microplastics from the bottle.
Nothing better on a hot summer day than a tall glass of MILK. I am a WHITE MAN and WHITE MEN drink MILK.
- What is this "milk" you speak of? You mean white water?
  
  Skin milk
There are many complaints you can make about American tap water, but lack of flavor is not one of them.
Why on earth would you put ice in water, treat-fiend sicko
- the cold makes it taste less of chlorine
  
  You can let it sit for a day or boil it
White people: Wow you had a spice in the kitchen when you made this food? I can't eat it now it's too spicy.

Also white people: Wow this can has more water in it than suger? I can't drink that I need something with flavor
My tap water tastes like chlorine.
- If you leave it to sit out in a pitcher uncovered for like 30 minutes the chlorine taste goes away
  
  or just use a britta, which is what i do.
Ice water is a tasty treat
Nooo, don't drink it!! It's a Commie trap!
- Our precious bodily fluids!!!
What do you mean lacking in all flavor? It is packed with delicious micro-plastics! For free!
- in some places you can get Lead, or other toxins,
I honestly didn't know people hating water because of the lack of taste was a thing until my partner met one of her friends who has that exact problem. She cannot stand drinking water unless it has one of those flavor pouches in it
- You can thank the sugar / cereal industry for that.
buddy I'll complain that that's not enough ice water, gimme more
- gimme one of those comically oversized gas station refillable mugs that's more like a bucket with a handle
  
  My neighborhood pastry-and-coffee shop has cold brew, so I ordered one. They ask what size and I say large. They hand over a big gulp of cold brew. That would be great for somebody with a fridge and a sense of portion control, but I only have one of those, so I drank the whole thing within a few hours. Turns out you can get a headache from too much caffeine, too.
Can I chew a fluoride bar with it?
- Yeah I find it pretty authoritarian when they put "flouride" in the water so I opted to get a well instead and drink more sulfur than god.
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- When I first started working, my boss would order a plain seltzer with a bit of lime juice. Wanting to be cool like her, I started doing that, and now it's more than 90% of the non-alcoholic drinks I ever have.
  
  Carbonated water and lime cordial is my go-to bar drink, San Pellegrino if it's a restaurant.
- I like tap water, and I like (as a treat) sodas, I still can't stand scented drinks like La Croix lmao. Edit: I even like sparkling water.
  
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- Sparkling water has that bitter TV static taste to me but I probably haven't had it done up all fancy
  
  Permanently Deleted
Okay fine
lol I got two kidney stones back-to-back because I was a stubborn burger who refused to ever drink water. Not making that mistake again.
- Is this real? Do Americans actually not drink water?
  
  Concidering how there's been cases of people dying from dehydration due to consuming nothing other than energy drinks, at the worse end of the possibilities of not drinking water I'd say it's a common enough thing. I do know for a fact most Americans buy and consume bottled water instead of tap water.
  
  A surprising amount don't but it's not universal. Best case scenario they've substituted all water for sugar water, worst case they've subbed it for soda and energy drinks.
  
  Roughly 155 L of soda per person per year.
  
  https://worldpopulationreview.com/country-rankings/soda-consumption-by-country
  
  Keep in mine that 1) the requirement for an adult is about 750 L per year, amd 2) there are some non-soda-drinkers who are well below the average, and others who are well above it.
The best water i've ever had came from a spout inside of a half sunk shack in the middle of the bush. It came directly from the earth and was colder than refridgerated water even under the heat of the summer sun.
Jokes on you, the copepods make the water delicious.
- Copepods are a more of a sign of clean water than a cause.
I'll take it with a filter, just in case...

Also, why cold?
- Cold water tastes better
  
  hot water tastes better
  
  No it does not. Room temp is just the sweet spot...
- To filter out the weak with sensitive teeth
I have superior natural aquifer water in my hometown. Rich in flavor.
Ow my teef
- Sensitive ass teeth having mf
- Drinking a beverage without ice would be doubly hard for Americans though.
aww yiss finally some good fucking sipppp
Can you put some high fructose corn syrup in there for me? I don’t know how to consume anything without it
Rubber hose water definitely tastes different. I drink from public bathroom taps though
- That's more extreme than the boomers that drank from the garden hose
that is my actual favorite beverage
Did it at least go through a Britta first?
- No, straight from the tap!
Depends, some place have tap water that tastes bad
goddamn the stuff packs real heat!
Ayy it's gotten so bad for me that I been putting salt in my beer. You got me.
Only if it's from a well
my dad was like complaining about some smell from the cold water in his taps yesterday and made it sound like the source was his own personal moby dick and like I literally didn't notice anything lmao
water
I will never drink water that isn't artisan alkaline glacier water packaged in a metal bottle for $9
Then there's the yanks that make drinking plain water their whole identity #hyrdohomie
I'm weak and want to be smol. So no thank you.

I found small amounts of fruit juice helps a lot for drinking more water, or just go with soda water.

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