I fear that I'm on this path. Like I don't want to die, I just often find myself thinking how much of a pain in the ass it is to be alive. Right now, if I didn't have children I'd be in a different place; the fact that I have others relying on me is enough to make me care. But I fear that once they are on their own, I won't feel much reason to stick around. I'm actively working on mental health but I can't shake this apathy in the deep down of my brain.
Again, I’m sorry this country hates you. I agree that minorities are facing a horrible situation. The difference between you and I is that I no longer believe voting for Biden, or the orange asshole, or the lunatic will fundamentally change the direction of the country. I can and will continue to support LGBTQ and other minority group policies and programs and people but again, I do not believe my vote will do anything for those causes. I am fundamentally against supporting any of them. I have a choice of evil, evil or evil. Instead I’m choosing to bow out.