Only the preferred word has changed

Mom, can we get starlink?

"It invited my CEO to discuss my 'concerning pattern of 3 AM TikTok sessions,'" reported marketing manager Jessica Wu. "Then it started sending my screen time reports to my mother with the subject line 'Wellness Accountability Partnership Update.'"

Lulz

The unbelievable part is that THEY would bother using actual flying drones to manufacture an emergency. Deepfake videos and bot armies to spread them are too easy.

For Passover

You are lucky if they can provide a PD who reads at a 6th grade level

I dont think this is true.

Shocking

Buffalo.

I dont want a Large Farva

If you can fill the swamp deep enough it becomes a lake.

May I subscribe to Pelican Facts?

Its not that. The size of modern cars is to accommodate crumple zones. This design is better for people inside AND outside the car.

But bad for the environment, since you are hauling around an extra ton of padding all the time.

Why doesnt everyone switch from Windows???

Zero occupant protection. Arguably worse than a motorcycle and a raincoat.

The metric you need is what percent of revenue was used to pay doctors and hostpitals vs how much was wasted on “buisiness expenses”

Profit is just the leftovers that they couldnt figure out how to spend before tax time

Futurama ended after 5 seasons

Next year we make slave auctions great again

Love that 30 day warranty

“The gang executes a CEO”