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My MIL recently pulled the "Think about what your doing to [my daughter]." After we recently set boundaries about her not talking to my wife until she apologizes to her for a previous incident.
After a couple instances of non-compliance we shifted to no contact. MIL threw a fit because she "didn't know what she did wrong".
What's up with your MIL? Is it standard sort of racism or bigotry?
Because I'm scared to have kids and introduce them to my parents. My potential kids would learn slurs just from the everyday conversations my parents have.
My MIL has just been generally unsympathetic to my wife's mental health. We tried to be considerate because my MIL was raised in a different time where that kind of stuff was just shut away.
She recently said some very nasty stuff to my wife along the lines of "You won't be a good mother because of your mental health".
We've tried to mend that with talks but she never really understood the damage she caused. Giving half apologies like "I'm sorry you took it that way" or "I'm sorry you feel that way".
We haven't received a true apology and we're starting to accept that we aren't going to get one. She thinks we're overreacting and tries to act like nothing is wrong and tries to interact with us as normal.
So we finally set our boundaries for our peace of mind. And she's starting to get consequences from those boundaries.
Wait, your MIL is talking to her own daughter that way? What the hell, it's just genuine cruelty at this point. Your MIL won't listen to reason, you're probably right to cut her off. God, I'm really sorry you have to deal with this.
I hope you and your wife are doing well otherwise.
There were signs of manipulation before everything blew up but it really came to a head once my wife recognized the signs.
I'm just glad to be out of the situation. I'm sure it's far from over but the hard cut has worked wonder's on our mental state.
Thanks for the kind words.
I'm really proud of both of you for standing up to your mother in law and keeping firm on your boundaries
Sorry you have to do it in the first place though :/