I can't speak for all of us, but I prefer "Autism" as a blanket term (that we hopefully all understand covers a wide spectrum anyway) over "Disorder". Yes, I get that we deviate from the neurodevelopmental norm, but "Disorder" feels condescending to what I perceive as simply a different way of working.
I also understand that some with higher support needs may differ from that perception. My opinion is not universal.
On the other hand, I'm perfectly fine with calling my ADHD a Disorder. Shit's chaotic as fuck.
I appreciate that. I have a partner who is on the spectrum and has ADHD as well.
I was only joking in the pedantic style often associated (rightly or wrongly) with autistic traits. ASD is the official DSM-5 term. Of course being a diagnostic manual, that focuses only on behavioral deficits. As I understand, the DSM gets plenty of criticism because like you mention, it omits all the interesting ways folks cope or even creatively use abilities like hyperfocus for positive outcomes. But on the other hand, I'm not sure successful behavior requires any psychological treatment, so that may be unnecessary to include in the first place.
Anyway, I think this is one of many situations where simple terminology doesn't capture the full nuance of reality. So apologies if that came across as crude.
I didn't take your comment as rude, personally. To me, opening with Akshually indicated that joking intent to parody pedantry and I took no offense. I just felt like expressing my opinion on the term with no particular judgement of your joke because I think that the words we use are worth talking about.
I know I have a habit of replying seriously to jokes, which often comes across as me taking issue with them. I keep forgetting to clarify the tone of my message. If only there was a medical term for that communication deficit 😉
this is why neurodivergence simply works in some cases. I do think ADHD is a bit of a disorder but ASD often grinds against it creating something more interesting.