I used the poor to defeat the poor

What I've gathered from the comments here, simply equates to:

Banks are for people with more money than sense, or people wealthy enough to have significant investments and passive income.

If that's not you, go for a credit union, who will be more compassionate to people who may be struggling financially and/or living paycheque to paycheque.

I use a bank because I'm fairly dumb, and also, the bank made it easy for me, with appropriate documentation to create/manage/access my father's funds when he became unable to do it himself. The credit union he used was nearly impossible to work with, and once they found out we had been logging into his online banking to pay his bills because he couldn't remember to do it, they locked out his online access citing that "only the cardholder is allowed to use the online banking system". To get it unlocked we had to take my father, who was going senile and either already had, or would shortly have a confirmed Alzheimer's diagnosis, down to the bank to have it unlocked. Through the entire process, he didn't understand what was happening, but he was able to sign the paperwork, so the bank accepted that; what's ridiculous about the encounter is that the documentation I had, which was power of attorney for assets, was scoffed at, despite being a legal document, signed, dated, with witnesses. They tossed that out without much more than a glance. So once we got the account unlocked, I started a new account at a new bank in his name as a trust account (for him, administrated by me, his legal power of attorney), and we promptly moved all his bills, and all his money to it.

We maintained that account because we couldn't close it. The reason? If you guessed "only the account holder can do that" then you win. We left about $10 in the account and ignored it for several years until my father passed away, we then did the rounds to the banks with the death certificate, closing all the accounts... Unfortunately, he had a handwritten will which they also rejected, so after about 8-10 months of working with a lawyer to get the will certified by the court and have the court appoint my brother as executor, we were finally able to resolve all the banking mayhem that plagued us for the better part of a decade as my father lost his mind. He spent the last few years of his life getting some of the best care available, and about a year after he died, my SO changed jobs (she works in long term care) to that same facility and can confirm, it's one of the best she's ever worked at. It's comforting to know that despite us being put through the ringer by the banks for no good reason, at least he got the care he needed and deserved in the end.

I still miss him and his weird unhelpful advice. I hope he rests in peace.