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bell hooks is amazing. I recommend Feminism is for Everybody for anyone who wants to know what people mean by feminism and especially if you want to learn about intersectionality
If you don't have the cash, there is a PDF copy on the first page of Google too. <3
Its a short book and worth a read. Also if there a whole chapter about FEMINIST MASCULINITY which is worth a read. Especially if you think feminism isn't for men.
If you like that and want more, I also recommend her book The Will to Change. It is about the same length, but goes into much greater detail about the ills that men, especially marginalized men, experience under patriarchy.
what people mean by feminism
I plan on reading through the PDF someone mentioned and buying the book at some point, and I'm truly not trying to start shit.
I think the best route towards good results is to assume good faith for as long as possible, and to try to meet people where they are rather than attack them for believing the wrong things.
All those caveats said, it's important to acknowledge that just as the broad category of "men" includes some amount of dangerous men, the broad category of "feminists" includes some amount of people who are to some degree misandrists. People who are not seeking solutions for the good of women or everyone but are instead seeking some form of emotional relief through a form of revenge on members of the general group that has (or they feel has) wronged them.
Sorry, I just feel like most groups tend to ignore bad elements within them. It's dangerous to assume that absolutely every single person who shares a belief label with you is good. I don't think anyone on any side talks about it enough.
Misandrists posing as feminists absolutely do exist. I actually lived with a few decades ago, back when women unfairly and even abusively criticizing men was considered more socially acceptable or even "cool" where I lived, and they were awful people. By definition, though, they're not actually feminists and are thankfully uncommon amongst anyone familiar with and practicing feminism. It's antithetical.
It's kind of like people who don't know much about socialism that tell everyone they're socialists because they are in favor of government safety nets. Many people don't actually know what socialism is (nor feminism, for that matter), so they don't know these people are full of shit when they make these claims.
You and @wizardbeard@lemmy.dbzer0.com are both correct.
Which, notice how bell hooks’ book isn’t titled “Femin_ists_ Are for Everybody”.
Human beings are flawed to shit and no group or individual (not even bell hooks) should be put on a pedestal. Rather, it’s about finding the language and behaviors that do the most good at bringing equity and dignity for everyone.
(PS if you read up on feminist theory you get the added bonus of now being able to call tf out of the so-called feminists who uphold the patriarchy under a phony name. With peace and love. 😉)