So let me start off by saying that I recognize that there was initially a genuine problem with people who didn't want NSFW content being exposed to it.
Some of this was due to the fact that not all content was being correctly flagged as NSFW, and some of it was because a lot of users didn't realize that individual users can choose to completely block an entire instance - which is not only a very easy and fast solution, but also does not require an all-or-nothing approach of defederating from NSFW instances.
A number of changes were made, but some of those lingering changes have meant that people who do want to see NSFW content are not because:
Even having subscribed to several NSFW subs, they are effectively completely missing from my feed.
Most NSFW thumbnails are blurred.
Both of these behaviors should not be occurring if a user has chosen in their settings to NOT hide NSFW content.
However, I will also say that the blurred state is something that deserves its own user setting (i.e. so that a user can choose to NOT hide NSFW, but still want them blurred or not) - preferably with the granularity to set it for various sub-types of NSFW (e.g. porn, gore, etc...).
I don't think it went too far. Not exposing people accidentally to NSFW content takes priority over giving people a better experience consuming NSFW content. If you want to consume NSFW content head over to an instance that focuses on NSFW content. For example, lemmynsfw.com will fulfill all your NSFW needs.
That's the advantage of the fediverse, you can have different instances focusing on different types of content. And having the main sites of kbin.social or lemmy.world focus on Non-NSFW content will make the entire fediverse easier to advertise to the public.
Nope. Content is mirrored and hosted locally, so it's the admin's choice and responsibility.
Moreover, listening to choruses of "individual choice" are how you end up providing a server for people who feel no responsibility to their neighbours and communities. Structural issues require more than "Fuck you, I can do what I want."
You can choose to use a different instsnce if you don't like what the admin's doing. Or you can start your own. That's how you can do what you want.
Edit: I do love the downvotes from the "I can do what to want" crowd, knowing that they're also the "my property, my rules" crowd. Except when they're the ones using someone else's shit, of course.