AITA for not paying for my brother and his family's vacation?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/HourStatistician2444 on 2023-10-06 19:49:54.

I (28F) have an older brother Adam (30M) and my Stephanie SIL (28F). Every year my family and I take a big trip and time of year depends on everyone's schedules. This year we collectively agreed for the second week in December. Those going on the trip include my husband Justin (33M) and I, our twin 2 year olds, my parents, and my brother, SIL and their 3 year old. My mom always makes all of the travel arrangements to ensure everyone is on the same flights, kids sit with parents, hotels are the same, etc. Everyone is on their own for getting to and from the airport at home, but car my mom makes car arrangements from the destination airport to the hotel and hotel to airport when leaving. While my mom makes the arrangements, my husband and I always Zelle/Venmo my mom for our portion of flights and hotels. My brother and SIL do the same thing.

This year everyone agreed to Disney World in Orlando. My mom as usual made all the reservations and what not about 2 months ago. My husband and I paid my mom our portion about a week after the reservations were made. Last night Adam texted husband asking if we had paid my parents yet. He said we had a while back. Adam then asked Justin if we could pay his family's portion of the trip. Not sure if everyone has been to Disney but it's ridiculously expensive these days. Justin told him we couldn't swing it with our budget at the time. We both work full time and make decent money but we don't have the kind of money that is just throw away. My brother and SIL both also work full time, and my nephew is not in daycare, my brother's mother in law watches him free, while we pay for 2 kids in daycare. Adam said responded with "Well ok then." and quit texting him.

Queue to this morning where I woke up to several texts from Adam calling Justin an asshole for nothing being a "good brother" and paying for their family. I told Adam I agreed with Justin and we just can't swing the money for them in our budget. I apologized and told Adam he was out of line for calling Justin an asshole and wouldn't stand for it. Adam again asked me to pay and said it could be our Christmas present to him, my SIL and my nephew. If I had the spare money to do it that way, I would, but I don't have the ability to do that, so I can't. I told him I couldn't do it and told him to reach out to our parents about a payment plan or something. Adam called Justin and I AHs and said we ruined their vacation.

I'm kind of surprised by my brother's behavior, but are Justin and I the assholes here?