Rule

When you look at the material conditions in which Christianity took hold, it actually is pretty revolutionary. It's a religion based on the rejection of wealth formed in the periphery of a decaying imperialist empire. I'm not religious, but those revolutionary ideas are based as fuck

No need to repeat yourself. Christianity is communist and if you're not communist you're not Christian.

Watching Larry the cucumber and Bob the tomato literally eat the rich alive was a little traumatic as a child, but I've come to appreciate it as an adult.

And he was right, of course.

I mean it's ideals definetly started with people getting fed up over how money was getting aggregated, then it started getting tied to religion and the Roman empire coopted it to control any narratives, turning what was probably the first instance of eat the rich into we shall just wait to be rewarded. Like the turn the cheek phase was not meant to be submissive, it was meant to tell you how to make sure the slave owner when beeting you left a mark which was a way to earn freedom at that point in time. That got coopted into meaning to take punishment and not complain, which is fucking nuts. Guessing it's why there are so many Jesus like story's from that time frame about a dude born from a virgin, walking on water, etc. they tried numerous times to coopt the movement till it worked with Christianity.

Larry the Cucumber

Don't tell this guy about Song of Solomon.

Try the stories in Judges, thems were tough times and crazy stories. The Old Testament is especially metal because the Jesus story arc hadn't happened yet.

Judges 4:18-22 (NIV)

Jael went out to meet Sisera and said to him, “Come, my lord, come right in. Don’t be afraid.” So he entered her tent, and she covered him with a blanket.

“I’m thirsty,” he said. “Please give me some water.” She opened a skin of milk, gave him a drink, and covered him up.

“Stand in the doorway of the tent,” he told her. “If someone comes by and asks you, ‘Is anyone in there?’ say ‘No.’”

But Jael, Heber’s wife, picked up a tent peg and a hammer and went quietly to him while he lay fast asleep, exhausted. She drove the peg through his temple into the ground, and he died.

Just then Barak came by in pursuit of Sisera, and Jael went out to meet him. “Come,” she said, “I will show you the man you’re looking for.” So he went in with her, and there lay Sisera with the tent peg through his temple—dead.

Ehh sometimes

It has some issues due to translation choices over time that I some cases would be better described as changing things to fit the translators narrative

It it can be pretty based

Of course a lot of self described evangelicals are very much not based