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I am Darwinism at its finest rule

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  • This just reminded me of a moment I had, years ago.

    I was so stressed from work, working on my 6th burnout for the year.

    I was meant to be getting stuff for dinner from the supermarket.

    I had money, that wasn't the issue. But I didn't have a shopping list. My partner and I had just briefly discussed myself 'picking up something' on my way home.

    I was paralyzed. My thoughts wouldn't align or connect. I couldn't think of any dinner option we'd ever had. So I couldn't configure a shopping list in my head. I think I stood in the canned vegetable aisle and just stared ahead, trying not to cry.

    I ended up sitting on a bench in the middle of the shopping centre trying to write a list on my phone. Eventually I had to call my partner and tell him I wasn't okay and he needed to come get me.

    Long story lacking events I know. But this meme made me think. Short of family emergency/death of loved ones, work is the only thing that has placed that kind of stress on me. Even in grief I have a sense of one foot in front of the other for any particular task. But burn out made me immobile. Completely saturated my brain and made it stop working.

    Our brains aren't built for that. They shouldn't be.

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