DroneRights was a really vindictive user, not only is that pup clearly different people but pup's not gotten into any meaningless slapfights yet
We're gonna make the People's Republic of Northern Virginia real 
Get an IKEA MARKUS, best decision I ever made. Cheap and my back remains unfucked.
Having read My Disillusionment with Russia after learning how genocidal the war against the Soviets was and how stretched thin all aspects of society were due to the breakdown of economy, Emma Goldman unfortunately comes off as an extremely embarrassing American who can't stop expecting everything to revolve around her. It also goes unmentioned in her account how many of the anarchist cells that were being "purged" were openly destroying and murdering the emerging Soviet state, this would be unacceptable anywhere and especially because this emerging Soviet state was exactly what was needed to end the economic crisis.
The conditions the Soviets made their revolution under was harsh and unfortunately necessitated the decisions made later on, but they should be critiqued with the context in mind or else we're failing to learn from their successes and failures. When we apply our own context and preconceived notions onto a revolution which happened over a hundred years ago we are unable to take anything meaningful away except the most basic and propagandistic things.
Yeah, I'd definitely say part of it for me was the unchecked assumption that "those" revolutionaries messed it up because they were cruel or stupid. As much as I looked up to the things they'd done, I looked down on them for their lack of "purity" and lack of democracy.
For me it took genuinely reflecting on my western chauvanistic attitudes, and meeting real communists in Cuba and having a legitimate conversation with them. Once I'd found out what a communist in an existing communist country was like, I'd realized they had the same drive as me, and were far more effective than me!
which, yes, set the entire rest of the world against them. They had a few teeeensy difficulties. They still used it as a license to be otherwise just as awful as everyone else, and handled their problems in utterly deplorable ways.
To be absolutely clear, the poor and lackluster decisions and retreats from "pure" Marxism and Leninism were by far the result of material conditions over a personal desire for power. The USSR was the world's first socialist experiment and thus went on to make mistakes which would be corrected by later socialist experiments which would survive the 90s, but many of those things were forced by the invasion of 14 imperialist powers and the genocidal war campaign of the Nazis shortly after.
The history of Marxism (from the Marxist perspective) can be seen as legitimately taking the most successful form of liberatory thought and action in the modern day and trying to make it continually work in the cruel world we're born into. It's not perfect, but it's been shown to work on a scale larger than any other strain of thought, and socialist revolutions have fed more children who'd gone hungry before than anything else prior or after.
For more context in this worldview, I highly recommend Blackshirts and Reds by Michael Parenti and Stalin: The History and Critique of a Black Legend by Domenico Losurdo
Volcel Police!!!
Honestly that's kind of a chauvinistic attitude, people really are not stupid generally, if at this time of heightened alienation you can't find anybody to talk to or commiserate about these things with you might need to go out of your way to find others who are of the same mindset. It's our job as the people who know these things to explain them patiently and kindly to others who want to hear, because ultimately our perspective is correct and beneficial for the vast majority of people (the working class). I've done this in my own community and put a lot of people towards socialism simply by being a good and patient friend and have never once stopped explaining how or why socialism would be better for a given situation.
I don't blame you for feeling that way though, without being in a proper organization it can feel really depressing and like nobody gets it, and that there's no way to start these conversations. I really recommend finding whatever org exists in your area and getting connected, even if it's a bit far out of your way for now. For me, being in a revolutionary org has been able to keep my revolutionary optimism strong, and I'm not so scared or frustrated. I'm in the PSL but I've heard good things about FRSO and the DSA as always.
DM me, we're actively running a drive to make sure we capitalize this momentum. We can exchange matrix info and I'll try to get you in contact with someone and make sure your application is seen.
My experience with the PSL has been good as far as democracy goes, I feel like my ideas and the ideas of my comrades are taken into account and used to shape the overall structure which we work in and novel ideas are often celebrated internally, and while I want to say "this is just my experience with my branch" I've found the same experience when working with other branches in other geographic areas. However, as with all things, there's constant improvements that need to be made always, but this is recognized by almost everyone I work with.
In regards to indigenous issues however, these things are touched on in the party's book Socialist Reconstruction (available on your libgen instance of choice) in which it was openly recognized that much future indigenous policy would have to then be shaped by working with indigenous organizations and people. However I'd certainly not say from my experience that there's a colonist chauvanism character to the party or it's leadership, this has not been my experience.
Ultimately I joined the party because it's the most visible, largest, and most dynamic socialist party and organization in the United States; while like all things in reality admittedly imperfect. Since joining I've been nothing but impressed with the people I work with, with the like-mindedness, and the really productive work ethic and desire towards building a revolutionary consciousness in this country and a revolutionary party ready to confront the next crisis of capitalism the US faces. I shouldn't be taken at face value though, you should speak to others who're active in the PSL or a potential recruiter if you're interested by signing up at pslweb.org/join. If you find that it's not a good fit for you it's okay.
Unfortunately with the way these things are usually framed that's an easy assumption to make lol 
