The idea of shower controls on the outside is solid if you have a thermostatic shower valve, that way you can turn your shower on & have it be at the right temp for you before you get in.

However in this instance it just adds to the bizzaro feel to the while thing

You are kind of inluck, there are a couple of PlayStation 1 games called Destruction Derby which is exactly this. The graphics are terrible compared to todays fare but they were fun

But which variant tho, TOS, TMP, JJ, DISCO, SNW??