Meanwhile my laser Kyocera prints full color full duplex and doesn't try any funny business.

Shit like this is why we as a species are doomed.

Reminds me of the videos of the metro flooding in China two years ago. Really nasty stuff.

VirtualBox :) There are some tweaks, like committing more memory to a box through a command line than is possible through the UI. And if I need performance, I boot into W10.

Ubuntu 22.04 LTS (basically the newest regular Ubuntu release). It has native support for my Geforce 1080 gtx and every USB device I have tossed at it so far. I you install on a desktop I recommend setting up a W10 VM just to broaden your options.

I had the same experience as you did: I've tried Linux every few years ever since someone brought it to my attention in the nineties. And it always felt like a hobby instead of an invisible layer that just makes my computer tick. After Microsoft tried to ram W11 up my arse for the umpteenth time, I tried again recently. And it was amazing. Absolutely zero driver issues and it is FAST and CLEAN. No pop-ups or sneaky ads or any of the other things that make me feel like a tenant on my own computer. I now have a dual boot setup Ubuntu/W10, where I really only still use the W10 boot for games. And I have my office and audio software living in separate VM's that I can use regardless of which OS I booted into at the start.

It's awesome.