forget the hair, but the questions must be precise and well-formed :D
seriously (ish), if the hairdresser holds my hair 2cm away from the skin and asks if this length is ok, and their finger is like 2cm thick, i don't know if they mean 2 or 4.
bonus points if they think that your connection is lagging
but that just opens the worrying space more: what if you turned the camera back on and there it was? isn't it better to not know? đ
Oddly specific example, but I believe you.
who knows if it makes me look better or like a weirdoâŚ
both. I've recently realized that during our 1on1 calls my boss is "looking at me", which always made me feel more listened, overall better.
I mentioned that on a different, informal call, like, "are you using some tricks..." and he told us he's doing no tricks, it's just that the camera happens to be close enough to the screen where he places the call window, and that's a laptop which is far enough that the angular difference is negligent. So that made him look better.
(And I think it's even better than looking at the camera; he was kinda looking at both, me & the camera.)
But I suspect that this can bite back quickly if you're in a meeting with several people and say, for a minute you (say, Alex) are exchanging ideas with one person, say, Bob while others (Cathy, Dan) are listening. The weird part is that in Bob, Cathy and Dan's visual experience you're directly looking at them, which will seem natural to Bob, but strange to to Cathy and Dan since they know you're talking to Bob right now so why the heck you keep peeking at them for so long, as if you want them to jump in to the convo or something..
If the situation was similar as I've described for my boss (smaller screen, further away), then it can even be affected by the way Cathy and Dan's videos are arranged on your screen. Not all are going to be closest to the camera, only the closest one to the camera could feel an eye contact, but that's not going to change according to who you are talking to. (There could be some technology or call UI design to help with that...)
Overall, I think with some video-calling experience people will generally adapt for the situation over time, but it may differ individually...
From where their eyes are pointing I can only tell whether or not they're looking at the camera, but if they are looking elsewhere, I have no way of knowing if that other place is my face or theirs or anything else (even outside scope of the talk -- it could be a bug crawling on their desk for all I know).
Okay this is gonna be the last thing I say on this - a lot of the struggle that women today face comes from the idea that women only exist in relation to something or someone else, like children or a partner.
The thing is, in so many ways we all only exist in relation to each other. So you're on to something, not necessarily exclusive to sex or gender, but yes that part is hard. And much worse because it also means that others are going to try and shape that relation and the power is barely ever balanced. It does help to realize that not all people are like that, but these things are really knowable, and everyone's situation is unique.
Eg, your role is to start a family, wear makeup and take care of your appearance so that you are perceived as attractive and therefore valued
Honestly, that part is infuriating to me as well. and I hate what it does to women. My personal feelings about what makes a woman attractive / free are my own, but I find it somewhat offensive how boldly people make assumptions about it and even start to normalize or ostracize others for following standards.
Not sure if we can do about it in general, but I do appreciate people who don't just bow down to the masses.
the work hasnât been done to show this is the sole cause
sure but why is it relevant? OP isn't saying that it is the sole cause.
careful with the straw, you might accidently build a straw man out of it :)
maybe I'm too much of an engineering brain, but I just want to cry when they put fingers in my hair and ask "about this long"?
Like, I know it's not a rocket science but come on, that's like 800% error bar.
Once, a lady had enough emotional intelligence to explain herself whether she meant "cut above the finger" or "leave below the finger". I will never go to any other hairdresser (luckily she's much younger than me so we could actually pull it off). I ain't got time for these axe throwers.
that should be the price of two visits and two mirrors.
...and a few drops of your own blood, I assume, but nothing more.
you can just say âshorter than the topâ.
does this mean anything, though?
I mean, could someone even possibly say "longer than the top" and be taken seriously?
(And no, no no, stop right there----don't even think of reminding me that mullets exist.)
Basically a cigar butt with eyes, shut up it works for me.
I was not planning to comment (i am no better) but even if I was, this line pretty much disabled me for straight 5 minutes.
I'm a ROFLcopter now...
funny how lot of comments are saying "i also look at my face while other person is talking"
what I meant when I was writing this post: looking at my face while I was talking.
...on second thought, I'm not sure, I might as well just be looking at myself 100% time.
I just love looking at myself I think Iâm great haha I also like to make sure that my facial expressions are matching my inside emotions âŚa lot of the time they are and I like the reassurance of that⌠I also like to practice facial expressions and then look at myself to make sure Iâm executing them correctly. But mostly I just like my face and what it does haha
... -agen.
When I speak, unless I'm sharing the screen I always keep looking at myself. It's kind of strange -- it clearly does not match a real-world conversation, but somehow I can't help it.
Edit: More context -- I'm wondering if others have it, if this is something that can be explained by some "brain" thing, and also how does it affect the conversation.
They say, 30 is the age where you have to decide which one you like more: tying your shoelaces or hamburgers.
I chose the latter.
Now I'm almost 44 and even undoing them feels too hard. đ
gorilla slippers
Good dog, those things are freaking scary.
hoser has a new video on how Saudi Arabia is getting ready for that part.
I would not say "not believe too much in your efforts", I think the tendency to simply scale down enthusiasm can be toxic in its own way.
I like to remind myself of how VĂĄclav Havel said it:
Hope is not the conviction that something will turn out well but the certainty that something makes sense, regardless of how it turns out.
Yes, being enthusiastic about false goals can lead to devastating results. Being hopeful by realizing that your work does make sense even if you won't necessarily see results of it, that's much more sustainable source of motivation.
Also, remember that no matter how it turns out you will learn something on the path. If anything, this is one of the "certain" parts.
Every time I try to understand how forces which hold atoms and molecules together work, I find myself wanting to ask this question: why not the other way around? Could there be an atom which has electrons and neutrons inside, and protons outside?
It feels like a silly question, but is there something we know about the universe we live in that implies that this is not possible?
This is not strictly self-hosted but another approach I which is similar in philosophy, and which I actually prefer in many cases: hosted services.
--
So about 5 years ago I got fed up with having to update nextcould (or was it owncloud? I don't recall) so I was looking for a hosting service.
Initially I expected this to be a bit of a burden on my budget (especially if one scales with users), but to my surprise, I found OwnCube (owncube.de), where the price was about EUR 18 per year. Great deal. So I went ahead, set it up, tested for a while and eventually ended up configuring my parents' phones to use it for storing contacts & photos instead of Google.
To be clear, I did not use nextcloud myself directly. I had been already paying for fastmail, and it's perfect, except it's single-user, so for myself I kept using fastmail, just synchronizing fastmail (using vdirsyncer) and owncube nextcloud just to have a backup and also alternate interface.
This was working perfectly, until one day, it broke. It just stopped working (throwing some errors on sync). When I opened my web interface there was just this message, saying the nextcloud intrerface is not compatible with PHP 8.0+.
Seemed understandable: they updated the underlying server to PHP 8.0 but not the Nextcloud instance. Not superb, but fine, I'll just open a support ticket.
However, the ticket went nowhere. The support engineer kept repeating something that amounted to,
- they needed to update PHP for security reasons,
- the plan I subscribed to does not "come with auto-updates",
- so --- I am responsible for updating the Nextclould instance, not them.
That does not make sense. I don't have access neither to the instance nor to the updater. All I can do now is stare at the message. Their admin UI did not provide anything, either (some "magic" button, URL or SSH access).
I pointed it out but they kept repeating themselves and eventually explained that I can either cancel the service and start it again (pay again!) -- which will give me updated NC but my data will be erased, or I can "book auto-updater" which meant I should pay one time fee about 70 EUR (more than double my yearly plan).
That does not make sense. I understand that I chose the basic mini plan, I can't expect anyone to jump over hoops. I also perfectly understand that any software can break because of version mismatch (after all, I'm a software engineer myself). But nobody knows how many times per year that can happen, so if I have to pay extra every time then my plan is unpredictable.
Sadly the ticket went nowhere, the support sounded like a broken record, with "pay X amount of EUR here" link. Seems like a definition of holding my data hostage.
Eventually I decided to cancel the service.
--
So the morale, I guess..?
-
Be careful to whom you entrust your data
-
Don't get too tempted with great prices. Make sure you understand what is (NOT) included.
-
DO keep your backups.
- For me, vdirsyncer worked great; it is a bit pain to configure and troubleshoot but the architecture is great and it gives you opportunity to sync between independent accounts and even plain text files, which can be a life-saver. (Even sync with google worked.)
-
Consider having more instances.
- Eg. you could pay one and self-host one, use the paid one as a primary access point (public internet, usually much easier), and the self-hosted one as a backup.
- Alternatively, one could even share a pool of instances with friends, split the bill and sync both ways.
- (You will still need an almost-always-running cronjob somewhere to sync the data, if you're going with vdirsyncer approach.)
Is there some mature and usable application or tool that would enable tracking desktop activities to aid in time tracking?
Over 10 years (back when I used Windows at work), I recall I was using an app on Windows -- I forgot what it was, definitely closed source, although very well made -- that would sit somewhere in the tray and just track my activities (mostly just active window title and app), and later it would enable me to look back at the data, analyze it and categorize the time.
I recall that for my rather ADD-ish brain, this was a life-saver.
I don't recall name of the app, but it looked kinda similar like timeBro (judging just from brief look at their web page and their demo)
I haven't seen anything like that for Linux -- I admit I haven't really tried to search very hard. Given the vast diversity of desktops (from GNOME to KDE to i3), technologies (Xorg to Wayland...) and work environments (native apps, web browsers, flatpaks, command lines, IDE's, Vim's, even SSH servers) I wonder if it would even be feasible to have something like this that would work reliably everywhere-ish and provide really useful data.
With any question, why is it always so helpful to know why the answer is the one that is? In another words, which principle of thinking and learning is most closely tied to question "why"? Or is it purely social act of expressing deeper interest? Is questioning for reasons mandatory?
I feel I know the answer to this question intuitively, but find it hard to express it into words without it sounding stereotypical and lazy.
This seems bizarre, because it's children who are most "famous" for asking "why" all the time, but: How would you, say explain to a child, why do we need to know reasons behind things?
This might be just EU thing, but is there an effective way to deal with endless "accept/reject cookies" dialogues?
Regardless of the politics behind, I think we can all agree that current state of practice around these dialogues is ...just awful.
Basically every site seems to use some sort of common middleware to create the actual dialogue and it's rare case when they are actually useful and user friendly --- or at least not trying to "get you". At least for me, this leads to being more likely to look for "reject all" or even leave, even if my actual general preference is not that. I've just seen too many of them where clicking anything but "accept all" will lead to some sort of visual punishment.
Moreover, the fact that the dialogues are often once per domain, and by definition per-device and per-browser, they are just .. darn ... everywhere, all the frickin' time.
Question: What strategy have you developed over time to deal with these annoying flies? Just "accept all" muscle memory? Plugins? Using just one site (lemmy.world, obviously) and nothing else? Something better?
Bonus, question (technical take): is there a perspective that this could be dealt on browser technical level? To me it smells like the kind of problem that could be solved in a similar way like language -- ie. via HTTP headers that come from browser preferences.
When we go out of our comfort zone, go for some new adventure or new challenge, we will naturally pay more attention to what happens in our minds as we're going through this new experience.
"Demons", i.e. results of past bad, or even traumatic experience can be active during our daily life, often in various activities ranging from getting out of bed to talking to people where we have complex relationships (family members, co-workers, bosses, even kids..).
In daily life, random acts of these demons can go almost unnoticed, but that could be just because we're so much used to them acting that we've already normalized this "mischief" as normal facts of life.
One way of exposing them is talking to therapist.
Another way is learning to be mindful and pay more attention to oneself.
Yet another way is experiencing something new and unique -- our brain will naturally tend towards some sort of mindfulness, merely by instinct of being careful in new environment.
This could also mean that people that are burdened by these demons too much (or in particular "effective" ways) can't easily deal with the things that they discover about themselves, or that their demons act on some kind of "meta" level where they can smuggle themselves into the very process of this growth. As a result, they will tend to avoid these challenges which could lead to further spiraling deeper into "anti-growth", and so on...
404: FetchError: invalid json response body at http://lemmy:8536/api/v3/site
but don't worry, lemmy we love you đĽ°, we can wait a while...
Author: me. Taken in 2014 during my trip to BoubĂnskĂ˝ prales (BoubĂn Primaeval Forest) north of Ĺ umava National Park.
I don't know what it is.
Author: me. Taken in 2014 during my trip to BoubĂnskĂ˝ prales (BoubĂn Primaeval Forest) north of Ĺ umava National Park.
I think we all know what kind of mushroom it is.
Author: me. Taken in 2014 during my trip to BoubĂnskĂ˝ prales (BoubĂn Primaeval Forest) north of Ĺ umava National Park.
I don't know what kind of mushroom it is.
