Oh I have seen those but didn't know they were mild. Good to know thank you!
Man the first song takes me way back and I had never heard the last one but I love it. Thank you.
What are some songs that make you feel like they may be about ADHD or the ADHD experience?
Here are some of mine. I love these but man I feel seen and heard and felt in these pieces.
Piece of Shit: wet leg Everything is boring: the beaches Edge of Town: Middle Kids
I know at least some of us suffer with issues with morning (and probably night routines) I just want to share a new toothpaste I love.
Boka makes toothpaste that is a wee bit pricey (12 dollars a tube) but I find I use so much less of it. It comes in very mild flavors (the mint is faintly minty) and it doesn't foam in your mouth.
Honestly this is the first toothpaste in my whole life that has made me gag or barf during or after using it. If anyone else has sensory issues with toothpaste I highly recommend this one.
Allergy warning though, I think they all have coconut in some form but honestly you can't taste the coconut.
I have a sunscreen I use over the moisturizer for when I'm outside It's a really high SPF but I have to be outside a lot and it's very hard to reapply every 2 hours because that means stopping what I'm doing cleansing my hands and my face and reapplying.. I usually manage reapplying every four
Ok long and short of it. I have ADHD and no desire to have a ten step regimen. And even if I did I wouldn't consistently keep up with it. I also work a job that involves me being outside in heat and cold and in an way that involves working with gross things so I get disgusting on a daily basis.
I have combo skin with my t zone being a gross ass oil pit. I currently wash with corsx low pH cleanser and love it. I don't use toner (used to but havent seen a difference in using it verses not) and am trying to find a daily moisturizer.
I have tried Cetaphul in the green bottle. It was okay but I don't love the feel of it and still felt dry in some places and oil in others
I have tried Aveeno for redness (I do have some redness and my mom has rosacea) and it feels nice but an hour or two after using my forehead feels very oily again
And I have tried Neutrogena Hydrogel and boy I love the feel but the product seems to not be very hydrating and I still end up with an oily forehead prior to work and getting sweaty.
What are some other options? The reviews on everything seem so mixed that I don't know where to go from here.
I have therapy at the ass crack of dawn tomorrow (7am) and I have nothing to say to my therapist. I have been sitting with our last session and am disappointed and frustrated. I feel unheard, I feel like she isn't a good fit but I am supposed to switch again?
Her bio said she specializes in ADHD depression and anxiety (hello me) and she has shown bias against medication and even stated that she didn't take the training her company offers to LCSW and therapists about medication so they can sort of have a base line of knowledge when their clients talk about meds they may be taking.
I don't know how to approach tomorrow and it's too late to cancel. My previous thought was to see her until I could get in with someone else but now I am not so sure if I don't have anything I wish to talk about or share with her. I'm tired of therapy. I know I should be glad I can finally afford it and have a job where I can use my lunch for this but I'm just tired of it.
I am seeing a few negative comments on here and it's baffling. It's a post about learning that your issues had something to do with a mental health disorder. No where in this post did it say my coworkers should fix it. My partner and friends and family need to be involved deeply in my health care. (Though part of my journey was talking to those people and asking them to point out things about my behavior I didn't think about or realize might be part of ADHD)
When I first learned I had ADHD I was sort of baffled and lost. I couldn't see how it got missed and it felt like someone should have noticed but no one did and I am still in the process of unpacking years of self doubt and terrible thoughts. Part of that process is realizing why people may not have noticed, or why you might not have noticed. Hell had a friend not asked me if I had ever been tested I wouldn't have even considered asking a professional.
This point doesn't read as blaming the people around them so much as grief at learning late. Grief at not reaching out sooner. Maybe some grief at someone not simply saying hey you okay? But it doesn't read to me as blaming anyone just sadness.
If nothing else it's started some discussion and some community engagement. I left reddit in the reddit debacle and sometimes miss the engagement that was there.
Aw this is sweet. I hope he knows how you feel. And it's so great to hear people doing things in the way that works best for them rather than how society seems it should be.
Aw man. I had no idea. Thanks man. I am going to not attempt to win one then and save it for someone else who could benefit.
Ooo getting fancy. I haven't done vlookup in ages. I'm not even sure I could remember how.
Ok wait so is it one reply to this? Or multiple replies to this? For instance I want to do the unsung hero thing but what if I think of a good meme? Should that be one post or should it be separate?
Also what does that mean for this reply? Should I edit it and include my actual post or a new one?
Man I am in neuroscience and I keep asking for deadlines. It's not happening no matter which pi I ask and I am frustrated about it.
I bought a mostly livable fixer upper. The previous attempt to renovate the bathroom themselves and really made some mistakes I don't know how to fix. They replaced the vanity (already damaged cosmetically) and tiled one wall. There is dried grout everywhere. On the wall, the molding, the vanity (which is grouted in) on the tiles. Idk how to begin getting the grout off these surfaces.
I will probably just replace the molding but what about the wall and the vanity? What about the tile it's self?
I havent. I doubt that my particular issue is autism. I don't meet any of the other criteria for it. But I am so glad you are at a better place and working with a great neurodivergent therapist.
God I wish. My spouse is the main bread winner but my job provides the insurance that allows us to see therapists and psychiatrists.
It's just me and my boss so at work I am trapped with the work load I have. My spouse has been understanding and has taken anything he can when I have asked but it's a balancing act because he has his own issues to work through.
I am working with a therapist and she wants me to prioritize so the things I don't get to are the least important and least likely to keep bothering me while I try to rest but man it's hard.
Tw: discussion of bad mental health
The burnout is real and strong and has been going on for ages. How long? I honestly I don't know, could be six months could be year. Most likely it was mild burnout some reduction in burnout and then more burnout to greater extreme, reduction but not completely and the cycle has gone on so long I don't remember when I wasn't miserable, lonely, exhausted, ate healthy, productive and so I have just walked down a set of stairs into a dark pit of who knows what.
Some days are easier, words, explanations, communication and such but most days I feel like a mess and can't get it sorted out. I started this process of trying to get better 2 years ago. Started seeking professional help and here I am. Am I better? No, maybe, I don't know.
I feel like the first med I ever took may have left me with permanent issues. I feel like I used to go through periods where things were bad but I dug myself out and was able to keep going. Passive suicidal thoughts were only popping up occasionally. Now it seems almost daily. I don't actually feel suicidal. It's just intrusive thoughts they don't even feel like they belong to me. Just like some gremlin that reminds me I'm worthless and should just end it. Then it's gone. No desire to actually do that and I know it's just a passing thought but it sucks almost all the joy from everything.
In this time I have gotten married and bought a house that I adore. I have loving family and spouse. Pets I adore, goals so why do I feel like this all the time. I do experience happiness but I can't seem to hold on to it. And I am getting worse at my job and further behind.
Not sure really where I was wanting to go originally with this. I do have a mental health team who I am working with, but I feel like I am not making progress. Appointments are spread far apart.
I feel like crawling out of my skin and screaming but also like doing none of those things.
Idk thanks if you read this far. I'm not sure what I wanted other than to maybe feel like I have told someone how bad it really is. How much I want to be better and how impossible it seems.
Because now I have to go back to work and pretend I haven't been crying that I'm not exhausted that I can get through today. I'm afraid to ask for a mental health day.
My new (first) home needs some significant siding repair. Wenconsider ourselves handy but it's a lot for us to handle and we want to have the insulation redone as well.
Pros and cons of various types of siding?
Tips for working with contractors?
What is the difference between roofing companies, exterior companies and the general reno or contractors? It looks like in my area they will almost all do the same siding work. Is it just a difference in naming?
I'm so overwhelmed with all the stuff I have to do and also don't have accountability at work and it's making it worse. Anyone want to be accountability buddies? Spend a moment every week getting to know each other enough to hold each other accountable and maybe send the occasional uplifting message?
I am a proud owner of a brand new home. I am in love with it. It's cute the yard is perfect. It is old and lived in hard. And we couldn't afford really nice. Pretty much everything we looked at had some serious issues so we chose the one we loved the most and the one we felt we could handle the issues. I have lots of questions so I will be here a lot.
I have a very basic knowledge of tools and carpentry but very little knowledge about how to apply that to a home ownership. So my first question is can you recommend books, websites, other lemmy communities that are also good resources?
And my second is how do you prioritize your home projects when under budget constraints and they are of equal importance or unimportance?
Last question (for now) how do you deal with the overwhelm/frustrations of previous owner issues or poor workmanship? (I still love it. It's ours and I love it but we are picking up on stuff that we didn't know about ex the neighbor told us there is a sinkhole under our driveway and it had already been repaired but poorly or the fact that we didn't see it empty until after close and it's obvious their pets handled the moving process poorly and have urinated in every room with carpet)
I'm so tired the caffeine no longer effects me. My ADHD issues are worse. It's effecting work. I'm getting to work waiting to clock in and sleeping in the parking lot.
I get home and will be tired but by the time I get myself fed and everything cleaned up and the dog and cat cared for and in bed (skipping showers or washing my teeth or brushing my hair most nights) I can't seem to fall asleep regardless of the exhaustion.
There is a light at the end of the tunnel but it's two weeks away. And I used to work harder and longer hours. I worked in theatre and events and tech was some of the longest days for a week or two straight so I feel like I should be prepared for this. But apparently I'm out of practice or I'm no longer able to cope like I used to.
At this point whether it's the ADHD or age making it harder no longer matters I just need tips for surviving until life lets up.
God I am miserable. I am in charge of managing some several thousand video recordings as well as making sure my notes on them are accurate (date time and number of clips).
Really wishing I had not simply written down those things on whatever paper I had at the time. Going back and trying to figure it out is not fun. Someone save me from myself and my incompetence.
Moved out of our apartment of three years recently. For the past one and half maybe closer to two, this booger and his buddy have been increasingly relying on me for food as other feeders moved away. His buddy went to live with my coworker and their other cats and dogs. . He is king of the house and a part of the family. This big bully stayed with us as he is bonded with our dog.
The transition has been weird. We let him out of the basement after a week and he puked on the stairs and went back to hiding. Needless to say, which cat went where was truly the best choice.
I was so worried about the test showing that I wasn't ADHD but instead a lazy pos. Turns out I do have ADHD and my mom was right. Owe her an apology and working on the best way to do that (I'm thinking a coffee date)
Anyway I am relieved I feel better knowing that I have a reason I struggle and it is because of me but things that are partially out of control. Now to work on the things I can control and actually make progress.
My pysch wants me to get a tova and liver blood work done before prescribing stimulants. I have never done the ToVA it seems like a relatively short test. A cursory search so it's accuracy is below 90% which worries me. What worries me even more is what if it shows I don't have ADHD and I am secretly just a terrible lazy person.
Anyone care to share their experiences?
Update: I'm a tired frustrated ham fisted idiot. What was happening was I ever so slightly bent the metal when popping the old plastic lid lock out and thus the new one could not fully disengage. Some pliers and cussing and it works.
I am attaching the couple videos that helped me get the thing done in case anyone finds this in the future and is lost and confused as I was at first.
https://youtu.be/d7tXnwpL5Zo https://youtu.be/Z1i0rOQXEac
My door lock on my new to machine gave out. Ordered a replacement and installed. Neither the new striker nor the old striker work well with it. It will lock but won't unlock. Is there anything g wrong with putting the striker in the mechanism and leaving the door open?
This is your friendly reminder to update your paperwork with HR/your job. Make sure your address is correct, martial status, tax withdrawal, emergency contacts, ect.
If you have no updates do you know how to do it if you should have updates in the future?
What prompted this? I eloped last year. No name change no address change just got married. Updated my insurance info so spouse could be on my insurance with hr via phone. Neglected to see if there were other things to update, such as paycheck/HR info status and noticed when there was an issue with my paycheck.
I work for a large university turns out the HR lady I spoke to last year only deals with benefits. I thought updating benefits would update everything else or at least push a prompt for me to check other things. I was wrong. Whoops! Here's to hoping it doesn't totally fuck my taxes this upcoming year.
Ok, so it is sort of a known part of ADHD that we tend to talk a lot or our typed responses seem to be longer and involve a lot of breaks and punctuation (or whatever these are called). We do this to be clearer in communication. We do this to elaborate. And often for neurotypicals it becomes a point of frustration.
As women we also often have a different communication style or methods. It is often softer. There has been all these articles on it. How women apologize too much (what prompted this thought), minimize themselves linguistically and why/how we shouldn't. And while I understand what they mean, I am frustrated with it.
For me "I'm sorry" is not an apology. It is only an apology when it is accompanied by qualifiers (I will not do x again, I will do better in the future, how can I make it right?) Sometimes it is social lubricant. Used in place of excuse me or to express empathy. When I say "I'm sorry your day has been terrible" I am not apologizing for your day. I didn't make it terrible I am recognizing that it was bad and that sucks. I am leaving it open to you to elaborate on or move on from (whichever you prefer and this is where non verbal cues come in). If I didn't want you to expand or wanted to find my way out of the conversation I would use "bummer" or simply "oh".
And that brings me to the impetus for this long ass post. I was told once again by someone I apologize too much and should not. And it really ate at me. I am sick of constantly adjusting my language to make others more comfortable. Im constantly adjusting phrasing, tactics, ect to get my point across, be clear and be empathetic. No one else I know adjusts like this or to this degree. I put a ton of energy into my communication.
And if I should stop "apologizing" so much so that I am not as soft or so that I am seen with more self esteem, why can't I say "Im sorry" as a non apology because that is what feels natural and best expresses my intention. I am sorry that the nuisances are lost on others.
I need to get into my password manager as I am transitioning browser programs. And I can't remember my password to a site nor the password to my password manager.
Le sigh. I trapped myself in this hell but I still hate it.
I was inspired by another post on here to sit down and automate some stuff. What apps have you used to automate things for you? Get specific what automations or workflows are you working on? And yes I just spent an hour automating things to avoid a different task.
I have a Trello and finally made a daily to do card for work. My reoccurring tasks (things I have to once a week or even every day) now have appropriate repeats set.
I downloaded buzzkill and set up some rules. Namely a certain group chat has a cool down, if my partner messages me it reminds me until I respond (though I'm going to have to retrain my brain not to automatically dismiss the notification). Notifications from my personal email are silenced until end of work day. My lightening tracker app (I work outside a decent bit) alarms when lightening is within five miles and just notifies me at ten miles.
I downloaded routinery and created a morning and end of day routine. Though I'm sick of this subscription bull. I wouldn't mind trying an app and if I like it paying full one time but the moment there is a subscription you can bet I'm refusing to go pro or upgrade.
I made a paper check list to review everyday for a work task that has multiple steps that I sometimes forget one of due to the loud noise, overwhelmed senses and time crunch that happens when doing said task. It's weird but I cant necessarily carry my phone or checklist at that part of work so maybe if I just memorize all the steps I will be better.
I have an nfc tag taped to the top of my washer that auto starts a timer when tapped.
