The prequels suck so much arse. They are proof positive that George Lucas did not make Star Wars on his own because without his ex and Kasdan what we got was unmitigated garbage with hideous design choices, awful soporific dialogue, overwrought action scenes and terrible, racist humour.
Fuck the prequels and fuck George Lucas. He ruined Star Wars for the true fans. I saw all of the original trilogy in their first runs. The prequels took a huge shit on everything I loved about Star Wars.
Not to mention crushing the dreams of millions of aspiring Jedi.
Oh you can't have the force, you don't have enough of this canon-altering mitochondria allegory.
Baby Darth Vader.... Cute until you think about it.
And... They clearly picked Natalie Portman for the role of Luke and Leah's mother.... Why did they pick so young of an actor? Too old to start training!? It's almost as if they wrote it with a 17 year old in mind but somehow forgot the "mah Christmas merchandising" rewrites.
The fight in the very beginning makes zero sense. There is an embargo? But why? Who is fighting who? If you are going to have a pivotal point of the story at least have a clear reason why. Sure they are bullies and they are fighting to move the story, but they kept coming back to it. Make it makes sense.
And rolling in flowers and being a "senator" isn't a real love story. That's a manufactured love story. Real life stories are when people are attracted to each other and deny it, and then can only admit it when you are about to be in Carbonite.
There is now a well known podcast called “Blank Check with Griffin and David”, but when it first started back in 2015 it was “Griffin and David Present”. Back then, its original premise was for two epic level film nerds to do a deep (and humorous) dive into the episodes 1-3 and try to answer the question “what is this about?” (Spoiler alert: they are as confused as you are).
The show, like all podcasts, can be divisive. Some people (myself included) love Griffin’s spastic enthusiasm for pop culture, and David’s rooted but optimistic view of cinema, and they both have a deep well of knowledge on all things cinema. Those early episodes are gold, and really made me understand things about where Lucas’s head was at with many choices he made in eps 1-3. They are still terrible movies, but it’s really eye opening to see how Lucas, on his own, makes nothing but terrible choices, and is singularly obsessed with merchandising and taxes.
I should go back and re-listen to them. I hope I’m remembering them accurately, because I remember loving that run of episodes.