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took an errand to the lathe, here's the trump 2028 campaign promises

  • find and dispatch the progenitor of woke
  • create an elevator into hollow earth from Santa's Workshop (hyperborea theorized by @BasedHitlerGroypMaster [Secretary of State] to be in the core)
  • disprove the germ theory of disease once and for all (can't see it)
  • new crime: politics in video games. punishable by death (entire dev team)
  • find the two individuals in that high school football kiss retvrn image that chuds keep posting and give them a medal of honor
  • new initiatives for fetuses
  • dewoke the sleep cycle
  • elon (bad k batch) to be interned in the tomb of the unknown soldier
  • rescreen 1950s ads
  • drone strike hawaii (woke governor)
  • review biased anti-phrenological crusade against lobotomies
  • find a way to initiate the whites-only rapture

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