How's your week been?

Woke up this morning and couldn't see a man in the mirror. I think my sleep bonnet hiding my hairline and eyebrow ridge helped.

Joined in club activities that I haven't been to in a few months. Not out there, but also not hiding anything. Got a lot of "I thought some new girl had joined at first, but it was only you!" comments :3 (This is a 95% male club, so I guess they noticed something!)

I'm taking that as a win. I wonder what they'll say this time next year?

Tired ('murica).

Tired of being obese. Body stubble has been painfully stabby in the Moob-area. Need to exercise, but need to make better dietary choices primarily.

Tired of being broke. Can't afford to move out of this red state(ohio), maaaay be able to in a year or so (less than a year of car payments now, wooo). Just fuckin credit cards and bad choices I need to pay off.

Can't get together funds without shit eating into it almost immediately. Getting treatment/(adult)diagnosis for ADHD and probably several other things would probably improve things.

This is possibly the worst week of my life, but frankly I've said that before.

I lost the love of my life to religious oppression, if I'd been born different it probably would have been the best relationship I could have possibly hoped for. But here I am again, born wrong and feeling like there's nothing left for me.

I'm doing well! Had a lovely Halloween with my friends. For work, I dressed up in a witch costume, and then at a party I went as Gretchen from Cuckoo, had a blast wearing both. A few friends told me that using she/her with me feels very natural, and that made me happy :)

Had a funky experience that I've been over analysing, and could need an outside view on, not directly trans related.

I was on the subway and kinda noticed this cool looking woman across from me. Lots of punk/queer vibes but who knows. Anyways, like any well behaved public transport user I keep my attention on my phone and music.

But then the train accelerates and the older guy next to me tumbles into me and almost falls on the ground, so I catch him which probably looks odd. This is when I get that danger feeling that I'm being watched, and immediately find out more she is staring at me. So now i know she noticed me too. Anyways, well behaved public transit users etc. back to the phone.

We then both exit the train, and when I get to the next transfer it turns out she's going in the same direction as me, so I place myself far away to not look like I'm following her.

But while I stand there stupidly smiling at my music, she walks right up to me! Like, 20 cm away and does a sort of 270deg spin. At this point it feels more rude to not check wtf is going on, but she has her back at me so I just nervously board the train that arrived and get off at the next station.

So, what could a less gtfo-like response have looked like? Obviously the subway isn't the place to meet new people, and I'm too depressed for that anyways, but that whole dance wasn't an ordinary subway interaction!

I tried to kms but the trigger of my 3d printed gun broke and I'm out of filament, so I ordered some to print a new trigger, probably gonna do it this week