Steal This Comic

Here is my idea: Everyone makes a private key. When they buy a song they receive the file and a digital signature by the label saying they sold it to your private key. When you are caught with a bunch of songs, you have to prove ownership using your key. Tadaa provable ownership, no blockchain, You loose the file, but still have the signature? You can download it again and all is good.

Ok, what next?
- xkcd comics are available under a CC-By-NC 2.5 licence, so you've successfully pirated by not including attribution (as long as people can't tell at a glance that it's xkcd from the art style or comment thread you posted it to), but to seal the deal, it'd be a crime to sell it.
  
  I couldn't tell at glance this was from xkcd and am willing to testify to a jury, when's the court date?

Small note: iTunes doesn’t have DRM anymore (since 2009)
Apple Music (the subscription) has DRM though, but you should never have a collection on a subscription service, because it can go away at any time
- Yes, exactly. The comic was published on October 13, 2008, according to Explain XKCD, that's probably why iTunes is in it.

Buy CDs.
- Sony would like to have a word.
- Fun things, under some legislation, ripping your own CD is not necessarily legal.
- You mean those things that get scratched all the time and not have their revenue go towards the artist anyway?

Last time I bought audiobooks I got them from Downpour which included DRM-free downloads as either MP3 or M4B files, in addition to listening through the website or app. I believe Libro.fm may also offer this. Most of my ebooks are through Kobo and are DRM free as well.
Does depend in some cases on the publisher.

Support creators though. Especially if the thing you pirate isn’t from a soulless corporation. This is why creators should always have something like a ko-fi or Patreon page. So I can pay them directly if I enjoyed their work.
- I buy a ton of XKCD merch for this very purpose. I support others on Patreon, by buying from their advertisers and by buying their audiobooks on Libro.fm or a physical copy.
  Amazon and other middlemen add nothing, they simply take a cut off the top. They maintain DRM solely to extract an maximum profits and lock in their customers and sellers. It is extortion and should be illegal.
- Dox them and send an envelope with cash.

I buy most of my music from Qobuz or Bandcamp. Perfectly DRM-free with lossless compression, and it's mine forever.

I buy CDs and rip them into lossless myself unless it's not available and then I'll sail

PSA: Download all your kindle books. Even if you don't plan on cracking their DRM, you'll have the option to in the future should you want to.
- Though do it before the end of the month! (Edit: the 26th) Amazon is taking that option away
  
  Wednesday the 26th, not the end of the month. If anyone is thinking they'll get to it later, you have three days from this post

I'd pay for it once to support the creators. Once and once only.
- After I paid Metallica for their music, more than once in some cases, and then they went to war on us fans, been stealing since.
  Blast from the past GenX!
- But think of the shareholders? How can they afford that 8th yacht?? 🛥️🛥️🛥️🛥️🛥️🛥️🛥️

Been stealing all my media for 25+ years. Get on my level.
- But enough about you robbing the local blockbuster at gun point!

Should I swap Audible for Steam and start another flame war? Is there a poll widget on this thing?

The most recent book I pirated was What If? 2.
- I have DRM-free versions of How To and What If?.
  They're made of trees.
  
  I really like physical media. Thing is, I don't have the space for shelves upon shelves of physical media.