I code on top of my Tesla to increase my ARR

Every time someone brags on LinkedIn it's about something that sounds absolutely miserable to me.

How shit do you have to be at coding to need to do it at 5am instead of enjoying sunrise on the beach?
This dude needs to get good.
- He is in California on the beach. This is a 5pm photo lol
  
  Yeah, at 5am the sun is usually just barely above the horizon out there.

Beautiful view of the parking lot (from his perspective).
- He want the sun to reflect off his monitor and shoot straight into his eyes.
  
  lmaooo this reminded me of that meme with serena williams hitting a tennis ball at mach fuck clean through a guys skull
- In his defense, I also have a west facing window in my office and it is absolute ass trying to get anything done from 3-5.
  Also, dude has obviously never worken up before 8am at any point since college, since you won't get a sunrise like that anywhere in California, and that's not what a Miami sunrise looks like
- Well, you can't be smart and show the sun in the picture at the same time.

Anytime I see these types of terrible pics, I think of the planning this self-important asshole agonizes over while the struggling gig photographer has to keep their eyes from rolling out of their head.
Peak narcissism and vanity, utterly shameless.
- Meanwhile my mate takes photos like this of me at the pub on the phone on the work laptop cause he was late for a beer and I was mid phone call when he turned up
  Mine is genuine didn't even know it was being taken his would have had so much planning
  
  this looks more realistic because of the annoyed face the subject is making for having to work at the pub.
  i left my previous job because of bullshit like this. i need a better career.
- struggling gig photographer
  Sure he doesn't have a fancy tripod and set his iPhone 18 XL MAX or whatever on a half minute timer?
  Although these types might seek out the struggling gig photographer just to feel power over somebody. Lol
  
  You’re right, that definitely could have happened too. I just can’t help but think of him trying to describe the shot to somebody. Though it would be equally pathetic to see him snap the photo on timer, run over, look at pic, reset the timer, try again… for like 50 times.

I used to work with him - he’s the CTO at a link-in-bio company, and yes, this is how he lives.
Fun fact. I used to hate myself and the work I was doing when working there, though the pay was good. I lasted four months

Bro could straight up double his ARR with a tricorn hat.

Oohh I know a guy exactly like this. Moderately rich, moderately successful in business and money and power is literally all he cares about and money is all he has. He has kids he doesn't love, he only cares about "his legact' and "his dynasty"
He's built and crashed like a hundred start-ups and a few became moderately successful so he has momey
He beliefs he is universally loved, but everyone including his kids hate h because he's an insufferable asshole who uses money to control people around him
He's obsessed with what people think about him and -again- thinks he's super loved, but he's super insecure as well, so posts pictures showing off his body building results to everyone but he pictures are AI enhanced which makes it all the sadder. He's obsessed with staying young and not dying so he takes these special stat young IV drips, that sort of shit.
Did I mention his relentless narcissism and psychopathic behavior where he loves to tot with people's lives, just to fuck with them? Family included, if course
He is a sad little man, really, whi one day will be buried in a golden casket but here will be nobody to say goodbye
- I was legit waiting for the reveal, with a "that sad little man?
  <INSERT_TECH_OLIGARCH>
  "
  
  He is exactly the same as these tech oligarchs. He possibly is a multi millionaire, I know he has a reasonable amount of money but watching him try to look like these billionaires all the time is just hilariously sad. He continually buys shits that's too expensive and that he doesn't need and ends up selling it months later.at this point, money is all he has. He has no people that want to be around him (with the exception of a new young sexy bomb gold digger he acquired recently) he has no real power, even his kids hate him yet he keeps dumping more money than he's earning so I'm assuming he'll die with nothing
  
  it's all of them.
  
  Made me think he was describing that one dude who has been on magazines, being written about because he takes infusions of his son's blood believing it will keep him young.
- I used to work for the female version of this guy.

what's with so many slavic techbros being named vitali? does it mean "arrogant" and it's just nominative determinism?

Because you can accomplish so much sitting cross legged on the hood of a car using 1 monitor. Must have a tough job....
- Sun at his back too, got to crank that brightness up to maximum, if he can see at all.
  
  There's no way actual work is getting done. I hate these pics of people "coding" in super unergonomic positions. If I'm really working on something important, I'm at a desk at home in comfy clothes.
- An ergonomic nightmare. But hey maybe all that money will pay for spine correction.

Is getting up at 5am supposed to be a flex? I'm a morning person and wake up at 5 every day just because my body is done sleeping.
- Kids wake me up before 6 every day too, including weekends! I might have to go find a Tesla to sit on
- If I were super rich and super successful, my flex would be "I get up whenever I want to".
- Couple of losers who suck at sleeping in!
  Actually I'm a night owl and people have different sleep schedules and they aren't anything to brag about. People who brag about being morning people like the douche on the csr hood are the worst.
- Exactly!
  The most important thing isn't when you get up or how long you work, but how much you get done in the time you allocate for work. Someone working 12h/day or whatever probably has a productivity problem.
- I wake up around 5 most days and fucking hate it. It's really weird, when I was depressed I could get a full night's sleep, but now that I'm properly medicated it seems to never happen. WHY?!
- I wake up at 5 a lot of the time. My body just wants to be awake early nowadays. I wish I could sleep in 😔

Is his foot having a meltdown?

Having had a tesla as a company car for a year, I wouldn't even dare put too much pressure on that front hood let alone sit on it 😭 just pressing it closed felt like I was gonna put a dent into it
- Bro already has an ass-dent in his swasticar that you can see in this picture.

Wouldn't the sun be setting on that side?
- I doubt he has that capability for reasoning, but nothing says that picture was taken at 5am. The text continues.
  
  TBF there might be more text like "I work to 8 PM"
  Edit: oh that's what you say. Sorry I was really tired.
  
  Good point.
- Famously, coastlines are fractal-like, and have tons of nooks and crannies: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coastline_paradox
  
  In California (see the plates on the car) there is almost nowhere you can get a sunrise over the ocean without seeing land on the other side across the bay or whatever. There are a couple spots where if the sun was as far south as it gets in winter then you might be able to get a shot with no land across the water. But this is almost surely not one of those.
- Which side ?
  
  West coast (based on the California plates)

That's not enough ARR!!

He should get that toenail fungus treated. It's about to go critical.

I don't get this picture. Should it have a "I'm to busy to enjoy life" feeling or a "I struggle so much, I don't have a decent working place" feeling? I definitly don't read this as a success picture
- Or, "I can't avoid an apartment, so I live out of my car" vibe?

I guess he earns enough to keep getting that dent out of his hood?
- Maybe it was born that way or he is sitting in that exact spot to cover up his nazi symbol?

I kinda wanna know what the comments that aren't shares like.
Plus, what's a link-to-bio and what's an ARR?
I'm just one of those simpletons who work with their hands
- ARR I think is Annual Recurring Revenue
- The only ARR I know of is Sonarr, Radar, etc. for torrents. If you've spent $30M getting those to work, I think you're missing the point

Insufferable tool