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Track_Shovel @slrpnk.net

2d ago

Cats

41 comments

To be fair, most cats 'train' every day, they just sleep in between. If you ate a controlled diet, spent most of the day sleeping, interspersed with some stretching and running and jumping on things, you'd be I'm pretty great shape.
- Weighing only 7 lbs helps a lot too.
  
  And being below the age of 15 in most cases
- I was just about to say that if you had spent your entire life doing parkour then you too could do parkour with ease. The reason we allocate specific times to train our body is because our daily lives don't contain enough activity to naturally train us.
- Also age & how much at what age different species age.
  Ballparking it humans over 30 are cats over 10 or 12.
  \ Humans just start aging after we had enough time to reproduce (bcs that's how selection works) yet have longevity way beyond our decrepit 40s - for that there was way less natural selection.

Their evolutionary path min-maxed dexterity.
We dumped int.
It really did work out for us, we just have to get off our fatasses to keep things going. Call it a fair trade.
- We also dumped it in stamina. Seems a bit OP
  
  Yeah and our cha is just broken.
  We charmed wolves into permanent animal servants.
  Course then cats charmed us into theirs, so swings and roundabouts.
- Our big brains take a lot of care and feeding for sure.
  We also adapted for endurance hunting and fine motor control in our hands. A Chimpanzee could tear your arm off, but they could not throw a curveball.

Cats work for 15 years max. You might live until 100.
- 15 years is not the maximum time a cat can remain alive and suple. On average they can live up to 17 years and some live to their 20s.
  
  "Average" is a really hard statistic considering entirely different living conditions across the world. Factor in street cats & baby deaths and the average is probably closer to 4 years.
- But cats have 9 lives
  
  In German speaking countries cats only have 7 lives :(
- I don't wanna
- Cats often live for 20 years.
- There is literally a Wikipedia page dedicated to cats that have lived to be older than 25 years: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_longest-living_cats
  
  The fact that there is a Wikipedia page for this shows that it is noteworthy when it happens. Further, most people in this thread have probably already surpassed that milestone
  
  Ok, median expected lifetime is around 15.

Ever seen how much your cat stretches?
- Or how much they rub it in?

Thank your erect spine.
- it's almost perverse, isn't it

"Yo, what's his problem, Boots."
"They hate us, because they ain't us, Scooter."
- They hate us because they anus?

Or those dogs which are just naturally shredded. Or Kangaroos. Fuckers.

If that's the case maybe you're eating something wrong, or have an undiagnosed condition
- Or a diagnosed condition he's fully aware of and is literally venting about
  
  Yeah, like being old

41 comments