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  • The first time Heinrich Kramer tries to show someone the Malleus Maleficarum, I appear directly in front of him and set the book on fire. Not only is the book destroyed, but a clearly supernatural event took place to put the fear of god into him. Bam. No witch trials.

    • More likely outcome: he takes a person in strange clothing appearing from thin air only to set his book on fire with a magical implement as clear proof of witchcraft existing and posing a huge danger. Get ready for turbo witch hunts on crack

      • He wasn't going to be any MORE nuts. Everyone knew he was a crackpot who hated women, and it was heretical for him to claim anyone but God could grant anyone powers. I make sure to do it in front of people and there's suddenly an audience to see him be condemned by a divine agent. If they try to say it was anything else, they're heretical too.

        At the very least, it can't get WORSE.

    • Or, the first time he steps foot in Innsbruck, he slips on a banana skin and slides down the street, much to the comedic delight of the locals. Helena Scheuberin even giggles and praises him for his comedic wit and skill. With high praise from an affluent local, and a natural penchant for comedy, Kramer leads a cult following in banana-skin comedic antics, and kick starts surrealist humour centuries before Monty Python.

  • I'd go back and prevent the 11th Sept attacks.

    The world would be a different place because so much happened as a knock on of that but at the same time it's hard to imagine what the world would be like. Probably very similar but also different in substantial ways.

    Like obvious things like no war in Iraq or Afghanistan (at least not those wars), and less obvious things like how the attacks have reshaped liberal democracies like the US and Europe (for the worse imo), and how they empowered right wing politics in many countries (also bad imo).

    • Yeah and also no more TSA (at least the one we know). Fuck TSA all my homies hate the TSA.

      • The TSA is just a federal jobs program. They don't actually provide any value; it's been demonstrated that they miss the vast majority of contraband. The most notable function of the TSA is the temporary imposition of an authoritarian-esque environment of suspicion and control on innocent civilians, reminding us to follow the rules, or else.

    • Next time you want to prevent 9/11, you probably have to prevent all the reasons they had to hate us.

      From ChatGPT-4:

      The history of Western involvement in the Middle East before the September 11, 2001 attacks is extensive and complex, involving a range of diplomatic, economic, military, and political actions. Some key instances include:

      1. Sykes-Picot Agreement (1916): A secret agreement between Britain and France, with assent from Russia and Italy, to divide the Ottoman Empire's territories in the Middle East after World War I.
      2. Balfour Declaration (1917): The British government expressed support for a "national home for the Jewish people" in Palestine, which was then part of the Ottoman Empire.
      3. Creation of Modern Middle Eastern States: After World War I, Western powers, particularly Britain and France, were instrumental in redrawing the borders in the Middle East, leading to the creation of many modern states.
      4. Iranian Coup d'état (1953): The CIA, with British support, orchestrated a coup to overthrow Iranian Prime Minister Mohammad Mosaddegh and strengthen the monarchical rule of Shah Mohammad Reza Pahlavi.
      5. Suez Crisis (1956): France, the UK, and Israel invaded Egypt in response to Egyptian President Gamal Abdel Nasser's nationalization of the Suez Canal.
      6. Support for Various Regimes: Western countries, especially the United States, supported various regimes in the Middle East, some of which were authoritarian, for strategic and economic interests, particularly during the Cold War.
      7. Lebanese Civil War (1975-1990): The U.S. and other Western countries were involved in various capacities during the Lebanese Civil War.
      8. Soviet-Afghan War (1979-1989): The U.S. and its allies supported Afghan mujahideen in their fight against the Soviet occupation.
      9. First Gulf War (1990-1991): A U.S.-led coalition expelled Iraqi forces from Kuwait. This war also led to the stationing of U.S. troops in Saudi Arabia, which was one of the grievances cited by Osama bin Laden.
      10. Sanctions against Iraq: Following the Gulf War, the United Nations, with strong U.S. and UK backing, imposed sanctions on Iraq that had significant humanitarian impacts.
      11. Israeli-Palestinian Conflict: The U.S. and other Western countries have been deeply involved in this conflict, often perceived as being biased towards Israel.
      12. Various Military Bases and Operations: The U.S. and its allies have maintained a military presence in various parts of the Middle East for strategic reasons.

      This list is not exhaustive and simplifies a complex history. Each of these events has a nuanced background, and their impacts are still felt in the region's contemporary politics.

      • To be fair, it's easier to stop 1 of the planes that crashed into the towers than to stop stuff that had a LOT of powerful people making decisions.

    • No damn tiny bottles and metal detectors before flights. But I dont fly anymore lol

  • Introduce radio to the Romans. They had the metallurgy to create coils. Even a simple Morse code system would easily keep their empire going. Probably end up like that Star Trek TOS where Centurions are carrying sub-machine guns, though. If want to read what a great SF writer did with this (guy from 1938 ends up in 535AD), read "Lest Darkness Fall"

  • Start flamewars on robotic astroturf accounts about how dumb Donald Trump is until Instagram starts and people try to prove he's not an idiot, but in protesting they protest too much and nobody believes them by 2016.

    So, I need a robot chatbot algorithm cookbook for the naughties and beyond.

    • ChatGPT with an unlimited account from several proxy IPs in 2016 could have changed the world.

  • Bring the secrets of caravel making to the Phoenicians/Carthaginians some 50 years before the first Punic wars. Maybe also some scribbles of the coast of Africa and the best winds to reach America.

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