I assume this article is about how I want to pull my hair out when trying to do anything in that program because everything feels so obtuse and weird and nothing else.
Has nothing to do with the name. I think it's cute and it's an acronym. I know someone that had a disease called DIC - now that's an acronym that someone needs to rethink.
This is very much like saying "Use Windows once, and Linux is ruined forever".
Once I actually learned how to use GIMP, I was able to appreciate it. It does things differently than PhotoShop, and, in some cases, I preferred the GIMP way of doing things to PhotoShop. It does take time to learn, though, and you can't just learn PS and then hop onto GIMP and expect to do things the same way.
I believe you. In my experience people I have spoken to that have used both emphasize the intuitive nature of PS use over Gimp use and that is my experience as well. If someone has financial constraints or is unable or unwilling to pirate PS, I would advise patience and practice with GIMP. As someone with a lot of graphic design and photo editing experience, I wouldn't otherwise recommend it though.