Hope this cross-post works
https://lemmy.world/post/927104
Although, if I had to think of beginner tips - knowing the keyboard shortcuts help a ton in getting familar with the game and one can use the "enter" key until you get use to it
I personally learnt by using the starting scenario of the shelter to get familiar with getting the basics of water purification, food sustainability and crafting going and camped out in the shelter and get my crafting up to scratch.
I know that I started to enjoy taking advantage of the weaker zombies in the early game and try and find a small town and try clear it out for a nice cushion to get one up to have a lot of raw material on hand, but that is more when one is more confident in the ability to handle zombies and found a style of play one enjoys
Edit
There is another one on the !cataclysmdda@lemmy.ml instance, but it is not my post but here is it is https://lemmy.world/post/1796938
Noita, a precedurally-generated fully destructible, with physics, pixel-graphics action rogue-like game where you play as a mage going through the various layers of a dungeon with the use of your spells that one can spell mix and match with a wand system that can provide the player with interesting and wacky spell combinations.
CDDA, takes awhile to get comfortable with the controls, but it does scratch a certain itch once one can get setup and start to test one's luck in search of the good stuff.
One has to make their own objectives for it though otherwise one can sort of just get to a point and not know what to do. But getting to a point where you can just walk into a city and be the most dangerous thing there does have a certain charm to it considering the journey getting there. It certainly rewards exploring though as one can find all sorts of craziness hidden away waiting to be found.
I know it is cliche to say but it took me the longest time to really knuckle down and play it, but boy once I did - I basically started up another playthrough right after to see what I missed and the shift in perspective when I played a different type of character was interesting to say the least.
So started as a skeptical intellectual who had to pull themselves from a sorry cop to a regular cop and approached things logically with a touch of eccentricity and pangs of regret and then compared to a wishy-washy communist with fascist leanings (which characters called the character out on) psychic superstar cop with an alias he truly believed was his name and I enjoyed and saw a completely different side of the game which was unexpected.
I cannot speak on the rest of the series, but I have played devil survivor 1 and 2:
Devil Survivor 1 does have a bit of a difficulty curve that can take one by surprise with the first major boss and it is like priming the player towards what to expect but its story I personally enjoyed.
Devil Survivor 2 is lighter in tone, well compared to the Devil Survivor 1, but I felt it was a smoother experience - doesn't feel as tightly packaged but it does compensate with having a better presentation and provides choice in a lot clearer manner.
I liked Devil Survivor 1 story better but enjoyed Devil Survivors 2 gameplay more
I can fold my ears twice - so from the top of my ear I fold it towards the bottom of my ear and at the point where it folds I can fold it again across over the first fold.
First thing that came to mind and I see others are here are of the same mind with platinum trauma response.
spoiler
So leaves me to wonder how far are we from the cyberware then?
It would be glorious but that level of attention to the art of "dancing" is a dying breed in games, personally a fan of the "one-stop drop shot" and the "fire man shuffle"
I will also say, the original Fallouts are games of its time. It sold itself off its narrative and as I am playing Fallout 2, it is still enjoyable but I do concede there are moments of frustration that one learns to work around.
It is not a perfect game, but it is a game that was written in a plausible manner that could be considered too real look at human nature at times and in the same breath going off the rails crazy with something out of pocket that can catch one off guard.
It does a great job of allowing one to make it their story, although some of the writing might not gel with everyone it at least framed it well in setting.
It think it gels well with people that can roleplay in a setting as even the combat logs have humour to it. It requires a lot of reading and the people in the videos look like clay dolls but it is bound to envoke something in someone if they are enjoying themselves playing these types of games.
The turn-based nature of the combat can turn people off, but I cannot deny the charm of running up to someone and giving them a concussion by wolloping their head and then going in to gouge their eyes to make them useless in combat and finishing them off with a shot to the groin.
You would have hated the original Stardew Valley Gramp Pa, would give you a stern talking too and declare his immeasurable disappointment (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻
I can somewhat understand though, I like the timer aspect even if I do not like the feeling of being "rushed". But I understand, you would hate pathfinder:kingmaker though
I can see them doing a better job of it yes, they are probably the closest to understand the how the older Fallout works and already have experience making games like it too in a more modern setting
Thank you for more eloquently writing what I couldn't really properly get out
There are things in Fallout 2 that stick with me since the first time I played it more than a decade ago because their are moments that feel impactful - it made me feel guilt for my actions, it made me laugh at something totally ridiculous and it has charm and subtlety that I feel Bethesda games struggle with.
spoiler
I am playing it now, fallout 2 with restoration mod, it is totally different to the modern takes but I can still appreciate it because I can remember a lot of it and therefore know that I am going to suffer through some early game difficulty but I can still gleefully remember building a character that could pop eye balls from ten paces with a BOZAR, remembering Cassidy has a medical condition, remembering to leave farm girl alone unless I can bs, don't bother with the Wanamingo's until I am stronger, Marcus is a bro, a mother with a her child in refugee tents outside a city, refusing people coming in without them being able to provide something, and her asking to find out about her husband, intelligent deathclaws, hubologists, Vault City Entrance exam, gecko power plant and be sure to antagonise the Enclave over the monitor, the hooded man on the bridge asking riddles, the dogmeat dimension, the unlucky dog, super mutants don't mess with until endgame, reno, vault tec and I can go on and on.
I played and finished fallout 3 and new vegas, played a bit of 4 and besides New Vegas giving me some of that old fallout charm, it does not have as nearly as memorable moments that live rent free in my head
Fair enough, Fallout 2 at least did deal with a lot of dark themes that I don't see Bethesda retreading.
In regards to the kids thing, there were ways around it, it was more an annoyance having to buy back stuff that got stolen if one didn't take those precautions and on an evil playthrough could cut the pretense and do it without much consequence besides the perk reputation as the place was a craphole anyway.
The older fallouts needed one to get into the setting to start the ball rolling, it is not a pretty game and would not be above throwing the playable character in difficult situation if they didn't prepare for it but it had a way with its writing that helped one to roleplay once one got to a point where one got established which is an older game paradigm that isn't popular nowadays - building a reputation, and once you have one can start to interact with the world proper.
New Vegas scratches that itch, but isn't completely the same
I suppose it is like playing a interactive book and then falling in love with the writing and systems that represented uncomfortable realities in an interesting way.
Bethesda's version is toned down
- Cannot kill children in Bethesda games (without modding)
- Fallout 2 dealt with some realities of porn, learnt about terms like being a fluffer if are not fit for porn and if you had the skills it provided a pretty salicious perk image and a stage name among a couple of other changes. Sex referencing was used quite a lot in game - sometimes disturbingly so at times.
- Gravedigging fair enough, there is a perk one gets in fallout 2 that hits you with karma penalty when you do it but otherwise point taken
- Joining the slavers in Fallout 2, you get branded with a facial brand telling the waste "Look at me, I am a Slaver" which had the effect to lock a character out of quests and be automatically branded an enemy of the NCR - which is a choice that can be made in the second town.
I really would not like Bethesda level writing and character gating to muddy the classics. I seriously doubt it will do the old series justice with the level of inappropriate content.
Easiest examples being the thieving children in Fallout 2, it allowed you "solve" that problem if you didn't have patience and got a negative quirk in the process.
A low intelligence run was almost a completely new experience with a different level of interaction that was tongue-in-cheek look at someone who really struggles with "standard" game narrative.
That not to mention how much of a mess it will be for bethesda to code for a player plus up to 5 party members per encounter ( making Charisma not a "dump" stat). I strongly doubt they can pull it off if it as a company is still struggling to make the player character plus 1 work smoothly.
I also feel that the old fallout's sense of humour might not fly with today's sensibilities specifically the level of objectification, a female character can use to their advantage or the level of "male power fantasy" with specific perks and SPECIAL loadout - which I am sure is something Bethesda will try to avoid as they seem to push for a more gamified systems.
And I really do not think they will be willing to make The Brotherhood play a minor role as they are like a "minor" faction that tries to avoid too much attention in setting in their mission to preserve the old tech from repeating the mistakes of the past
I strongly doubt Todd and his team are the right people to devote resources to truly capture the dark world of old fallout into a faithful reproduction. I think it would be toned down and would most likely follow a bethesda vision for the series.
Maybe I am being overly negative, but I feel even if they maybe revamped it with some prettier graphics and modern system sensibilities, it might still lose some of its soul in the process. I am willing to be proven wrong though
A blog space where I share my personal opinions and views when it comes to video games. I write about games old and new in a means to express myself.
Just finished uploading the last of my reviews on Firaxis' take on XCOM. In the link, is the page of the 5 games reviewed.
Hope whoever reads it - enjoys
Thank you for the information
I guess that is for even older systems that one knows will run within the limitations of 32-bit systems but will not be negatively impacted by it?
The more I know, did throw me off though and changed the keyboard setting to US and haven't had issues. At least all the other information will be to my liking so that is a happy accident at least.
Appreciate the information, thank you
Thank you for the link, I can definitely have a look at that to get better performance with limited resources
Thanks, and in regards to the sound I think it might be a failure of the mic itself and not a software thing ( seems to not pick up audio on two different devices - tried on one before and now again on the new install seems to be the case - audio just picks up a popping sound and not voice at all) . I probably need to look at a cheap one-off microphone to get me by. 2 Browser stuff is a bit harsh with only 2Gb - need to look at maybe getting firefox lite or something lightweight, but I can get used to 1 tab at a time, can think of it as an opportunity to try work towards something more, but overall pretty impressed by what it is able to accomplish with the old tech.
I feel I have been converted away from microsoft and like what I am seeing with Linux systems so far. I will likely consider it for future systems if I am able to get something more capable later down the line
Thanks I will have a look at it
Edit Exactly as you said, the language prompt that I thought as default language was the prompt for "keyboard language" during installation
Thanks again for the help
Good day
I would please like to ask for suggestions for first time installation of linux on an old pc that has recently come into my possession
It is
Pentium 4 3.4 Ghz (2 cpu) 2 Gb Ram 1Tb hardrive Onboard graphics 128 mb
I have been looking at Mint and I am assuming that the Xfce Edition would probably be the smarter choice, but I am curious to know if I could use something like Cinnamon Edition and will it run smoothly hitting at the minimum spec of 2Gb RAM. Is their other alternatives that provide a good exprience for the limited resources as I decide to take the plunge?
Last review for the month. Seeing as Adventure Mode for the KitFox Version is coming out next month, decided to do a write up for it
I just wanted to express gratitude to those that helped give that little push to just blog what I feel and go with it. I have gotten to the point where I have published my 20th post today.
Although I do feel my blog site needs work, It has at least made me more confident to try and push my work into social networks by uploading posts of it on Mastodon and using my old Facebook as well. It is giving me more confidence to try "market" it I guess.
Still trying to figure out my schedule and most likely going to look at my least viewed posts and bring them up to the standard of the ones that got more views but overall I do feel better about myself while doing this expression of self
So with that I give a Thank You to the community 🫡
;tldr
Find something you enjoy and try and capture it in a way that you can look at it and appreciate what you do, I mean you might not appreciate it but it can be something that gets all that built thoughts out into the open so it is easy to see with one's own eyes.
I know and understand it will not work for everyone but I still hope it can be a positive contribution from my own experiences and I can only hope it can be useful for someone
End tldr;
So I have posted a lot and it felt a bit selfish always using the service but not really contributing.
I don't know how long I can keep it up, but over the past 2 weeks I have been trying to blog a video game article every day on my personal blog. I mean I should space things out so that I don't burn out of course, but so far just doing the writing has helped me not be overwhelmed with thought.
Perhaps it is a distraction, but I do feel less social anxiety as I am branching out more on Lemmy and try to engage with people more and I think for that is good thing.
I don't know if it is good advice or not, but for me it feels being able to express something one really enjoys in what ever way that one is most comfortable with and then being able to reflect on it - in my case writing and then going over it and then being able to say I completed something when I publish it - has created to me a, I can only assume, a postive feedback loop.
I write this as I am someone that enjoys being social but is incredibly socially insular, and in writing the video games blogs it is making me feel more comfortable trying to branch out as I "empty my head" so to speak.
I made contact with the friends I felt ashamed of being a detriment to the group and explained my situation, stating I would communicate every now then via posting but be unable to communicate via voice
I even made a Mastodon account, and although I spent most of the day trying to figure out how to write and learn about correct # usage while stil building up the courage to use because I have never been big on social media before, I finally got around to post to share my blog online and I built that courage by myself, which I however small is an achievement to me considering I have always felt I cannot do things without someone else's help.
The help I did get from going to a blogging group is to just not care what other people say and write for myself, create something I want and over time I can make it better and refine. Just so long as I am doing something that is a good thing. If nothing else writing can be for its own benefit and that has a reassuring comfort for someone like me that is incredibly harsh on myself as well.
There is probably a name for this, but I guess in absence of other choices, this is almost like therapy for me in a sense. I still do strongly recommend that those that can should seek professional help though
Hi, I just started trying to blog (video games opinion and I suppose it could fall under reviewing as well) and I feel a bit overwhelmed thinking whether it feels "correct" or if it is missing something.
Currently it is just writing with pictures with it linked where I took it from on the title text option on the images and the publishing that.
Is there any sites or resources one can recommend for reading?
I am more than willing to read any advice anyone would like to share as this is still very new for me.
I am using Blogger, so if there is any tips anyone would like to share in regards to the platform, I am also willing to read those as well.
Tldr:
Seeing lemmy posts about Disco Elysium reminded me of something that resonanted with me and its been bubbling wanting to get out and the other topic feeling lonely and isolated from friends due to hardware failure and a growing sense of low self worth and loneliness with some introspection.
: End tldr
First off I want to preface that I am going to be using a game and I guess how it emotionally resonated with me when I tried empathasing with the main character.
The game in question being Disco Elysium.
Although I myself cannot directly place myself in the shoes of the protaganist the game did catch me in a lot of moments where I am in a situation and just think "damn, that sounds like me" at times.
From the commentary of being a "Sorry Cop", that I have tried to move past in my life ( being someone that used to say "sorry" a lot)
To the many different examples of falling into a line of thought or idealogy and being exposed to the idea that maybe I might be inclined to ideas because I have been hurt and in that hurt I have lashed out mentally clawed onto these ideas less from thinking clearly to maybe it just makes me feel better to identify with something to try forget about the pain.
A part in particullar resonanted with me in the first run through the game where the protaganist talks to their ex-wife, it resonated with me from a moment in my life where I mentally fell blindly in love, was rejected and come to the realisation I was being used.
It isn't an exact situation from any stretch but the emotion of wanting someone and wanting to get an answer and seeing that he felt he was not good enough, really hit home in a different way from how I usually have ruminated - mainly because I expressed but never had anyone to empathise with being felt betrayed and abandoned.
In a weird way, I could empathise with the longing the character had and how painful it coukd feel, at the anger I have carried in me and how I could feel that anger in the character. It was like "I know this, and I know how you feel" and the game explores this with the destructive( and the potentially destructive) behaviour the character goes through in the game.
When I played it a second time I really went pretty hard into the worst emotions I felt during those times and it was I guess eye-opening to see the self-destructive behaviour from the outside where the character was a philosophical mess embracing many different philosophies falling in with facists and communists, the uncomfortableness of almost making a little girl cry, catching that in myself in that moment and really feeling bad exposing a child to the ugliness of the world when they express a world view with their child-like innocence.
And what really sealed the deal in making take a step back and think on things is when the protagonist has genuine heart to heart with other broken people and then just hitting right through to a root cause that
"Hey, that person really messed you up didn't they. It's okay and maybe your life is a mess because you cannot forgive yourself and you doing all these wild things, believing all these ideologies because you feel hurt and you do all these things to try replace that pain with something, anything that can make you feel better"
It just hit differently feeling personally called out but not in the way that they reprimand and ridicule you but just in a way that says "hey the world is fucked up, people will do fucked up things, things will not always work out and we all carry baggage."
Isolating yourself and trying to carry the weight of the perceived world on your shoulders can lead to self destruction and ruin, but when people genuinely listen and, even though their situation can be similar or worse, listen with sympathy and understanding that one can start to take steps to heal oneself.
I guess seeing news of Disco Elysium around Lemmy sparked the memory, but yeah even though things are not great for me and I feel myself falling back into my isolation as events that was planned to improve fell through and my personal situation not getting better with things I also planned to use breaking down as well.
In regards to the breaking down of things was my computer which one could argue was the thing that was keeping my sanity in check somewhat probably in the same vein I suppose an addict uses substances to deal with issues if I try be honest with myself.
On the other hand it was a lot easier to communicate with people but when it died, I tried communicating with the mobile device and unfortunately the earpieces are kind of trash with it having degraded audio or static while communicating also on top of the charger cable breaking and having to playing round robin in the household with a single working charger.
With the events just piling on in a negative momentum, I think I feel incredibly lonely and low value because that is how I feel around my peers when I cannot engage with them when I feel I bring nothing to the table and feel like I actually make the experience worse
When the pc was working I attempted to make videos, however every time I tried I would be bitterly disappointed with my own voice and it would demotivate me from further editing and attempting to create.
I suppose with the forceful break from it I guess deep down I really just wanted to make videos to be recognised and acknowledged, however I hated the content I was trying to make because it felt lifeless and phoned in. I guess I was so focussed on trying to be "perfect" that I just made myself more unhappy when I couldn't do something I really do enjoy doing but feel incompetent in trying to get that across.
This was all very loaded again, but it has been building up inside of me for awhile and I really needed to just write something otherwise I feel I would stubble down into the "madness" pit.
I would like to preface there is some foul language and potentially dark musings that I am going to express...
If it is beyond acceptable measures and rules of the group I understand I accept it being removed.
I am really trying to win a mental battle, but I just can't win
I am engulfed in negativity, surrounded by voices of negativity, my past haunts my negativity, and feel my future is going to lead just to negativity.
I am a broken shell of an individual that doesn't want to be broken but nothing seems to break me free from my mental prison.
I have tried to keep it under control, but recently seems I am in less control than I feared.
An ex recently came to me via social media to ask for support for the difficulties they are experiencing in their life and in conversation something from the past came back to surface, which later seemed to be but a metaphorical vent in volcano as they wished to wipe the slate clean.
This gesture seemed to reverberate with a painful memory which is associated with an even greater painful memory sphere. This soon erupted into a tirade of expression that brought out the suppressed emotion of the greater memory sphere. This I thought lightened my burden and to try make up for my outburst tried to reconcile with selfless support, however a day after a conversation seemed to snap an even greater repressed emotion.
I was not hovering between panic attack and tears, but tears and emotional numbness, this continued until a point it seems my unconscious mind put a stop to it as I reached a point where I couldn't feel any emotion anymore, like I had just administered drugs. My body was just dead to emotion and tired and just empty.
It was like even soul was broken and just had enough and put a stop to it. All I felt like doing is just lie down and try and sleep, like some husk of a person just run bare. In the morning, the back of my neck sore and I felt empty still.
This individual undergoing their stresses has since pulled away and removed themselves from my life as they have their issues to deal with and I am too heavy negative presence to deal with.
The tangled web of suppressed fear, disappointment and anger is so ingrained that I cannot see anyone that would have the patience to untie it... I could never afford the amount of therapy to get help for this and even if I could I am so jaded by never finding any progress or answers that I fear all I will do is waste that money if I tried.
I say this from going to university, and seeing the student councellors and probably of the 10 or more I saw only one had any inkling of providing an diagnosis and another help conceptualize a slightly better outlook. The rest was trying to tell me my problems aren't my problems, seek religion, or just write down what i say.... every single one I seem to address a new issue almost like I was just trying to unload the accumulated burden of the past.
I will give acknowledgement to those that tuned down my most violent thoughts.
Although this is by and large ancient history, I believe the wellspring from which my deepest hatred, pain and fear comes from is the betrayal of someone I put naive trust in. It was the straw that broke the camels back and imprinted in me an incredibily destructive scar upon my psyche.
I acknowledge that I took their attitude poorly and acted in way that should have been acted upon sooner. But this wrong behaviour led to a day when this individual showed a group of people where I lived, which is with my family.
This action snapped something inside of me, it invoked an incredible surge of hatred. To punish me for my actions I could accept, but the thought of hurting my family for my actions was unforgivable and swelled me with an incandescent rage.
I say this as my brother is mentally disabled and the thought that he could get hurt for my actions fueled an anger I do not think I have come close to yet. This burning rage was always present waiting for a strike that never came, until under advisement of her mother said I should just write a letter out and just get it out my system.
My trust and naive constantly mocked as we worked in the same environment as she would loudly speak about her recandled flame with the boyfriend that had cheated on her come back together, with him even coming into the store on occassion where they make a public display of things.
The letter I wrote scathing and fully expecting reprisal... i wished to paint a bullseye upon myself and myself only
My mentality was that of a death seeker looking for one final violent defiant release. The day did come when I was threatened and I know fight or flight kicked in as I was filled with addrenaline, happy, eager, waiting for the first strike to be thrown. This was done while I was working and everything in my body felt happy to finally have this moment. But the moment never came and only threats for after work reprisal were given..
The addrenaline past, and my higher functions kicked in and soon realised what the fuck was I feeling, when finally confronted with release I was feeling eager smiling at the opportunity...but when it past that part of me scared the living bejeebus out of me.. i fell into a panick attack as I had no idea what the hell is wrong with me.
It was at moment, a part of me was scared I realized I wanted to live. The thought of what i was willing to through with was horrifying, that anger, that rage it scared me something fierce.
Just writing this makes my heart beat fast and hard like a constant knock at the door as I lie in bed.
I tried to seek some help but it was the before mentioned free university student services and that was met with mixed results.
But it seems this pain, this learning experience scarred me in the way that I was too stupid to process the real world and in doing so I almost caused so much hurt for someone regardless of the outcome be it in my death or the death of the ones threatening me.
I tried to to move on, but every attempt fails, always always something happens that draws me to the pain
I was incredibly lonely growing up, so much so I would go mad and feel like my head woud explode from the pressure, physical pressure of trying to make sense of it all. All the while I needed to hide my pain, my actions my thoughts to not make my parents feel that they raised 2 mental disabled children.
From that point on people that I would come close to would take advantage of my kindness, my trust and this further eroded my pysche, I tried to move on, but behind me was an every growing baggage that would get heavier and heavier to carry as each successive people would take more and more from me.. and add to this seeing such messed up things happen with people around them and it just made the problem worse and worse.
It my problem that I got so desparate for some form of affirmation that the only people I seem to draw were the wrong type of people...
I mean this type of behaviour was going on for awhile with various levels of betrayal and anguish even before the fateful tipping point, but as I wrote before that the point where I got so angry was a point where I felt the ever downward spiral take a free fall
It effects every part of my life and with every failure just seems to get worse and worse
I cannot even see myself worthy being anyone's better half because I am too broken to fix.... to try is to delve into madness itself and I cannot expect anyone to have the mental fortitude and patience to dig through so much filth. This even in the face of being told I have examplary morals, I just cannot be anyone else's burden.
I even have been told before to seek a priest to rid myself of the demons.
Somehow I have found a way to make friends, even with repeated faliure, I somehow have met individuals that are cut and above the usual pieces of shit human being I seem to have seem to associate with, but I am trying to keep this mess of a human being out of it. What I have shared is to a point I believe palatable to average consenus of the group and I never or want or expect them to provide support in my mental battles as just having "decent human beings" to be in contact with is a treasure.
I have other issues where I do not have a voice to correct the wrong assumptions and standing up for myself when I feel that I receive unfair treatment in a respectful and dignified manner and tend to keep quiet, but that would require another long and exhausting write essay and I am just drained after writing this.
I apologize yet again for language use and potentially dark tone, but I did try to compress this to not go into too much detail, as I have a terrible habit of writing too much and hopefully this more palatable.
But yeah, if I would surmise I am a broken person haunted by a past that holds onto me as a means to protect myself from myself but in doing so makes my life incredibily miserable and any longings and aspirations I have is such a broken concept that I feel whatever I do is doomed to fail and only bring about more misery and pain in an endless self-perpetuating cycle of failure and regret that I feel that doing anything is pointless as it will only lead to having me needing to deal with even more stuff that perpetuates the unending cycle
I know this unhealthy, I know it is wrong and I know I need help but I cannot see anything really helping this it is more than needing drugs as all it will help with is regulation and chemical balance, but my mind is a shattered broken mess that no amount of drugs can ultimately fix, maybe make the house keeping easier but there is some foundational problems I know is the root causes but all help I received is from the freely available sources and those sources all seem confused about is the problems because they have just best guesss so far and feel drugs will fix things.
I am not targeting any group, race or religion or whatever, just an observation why does it seem that freedom of speech appears to invoke an image of a defence to be an asshole?
I get it, free to speak your mind and all and sometimes hard truths need to be said that but is the concept so out of whack that people have less empathy for others that they don't agree with that they antagonise another to the point of disrespecting the right to dignity?
It seems like humanity is hard wired for conflict and if it isn't actively trying to kill itself it seems to find an outlet for violence some way somehow. Maybe it is social conditioning or just some primal urge that makes humans human.
I don't even know where else I could ask it, and it seems kind of stupid to think about so... have at thee
Will future generations look at how big corporations do business today like drug dealers - have a product and then try and hijack the brain into continuously wanting or using said product - like how medical herion and cocaine were used as acceptable medical treatments in , I hopefully, assume ignorance
I mean maybe it won't matter in the future, but was thinking how today's society seems to be in an "addiction" culture. I mean in a sense that research is done into how to keep people engaged and hooked onto something to control how your brain perceives things and then profit off it like some drug dealer making their drugs more addictive to retain and expand their client list.
Writing it I feel like some conspiracy nut calling corpo - drug dealers, but I look at these monetization schemes, manipulations of "big savings", data harvesting and manipulation and how actions are taken to narrow one's view towards a specific option.
It all seems like it tries to draw you in and then once its got you tries get you to "do one more hit".
Hi, I was redirected here after asking about this topic
I would please like to know if there a platform ( hopefully that is the right terminology) on peertube or an instance in the fediverse that deals with questions in regards to finding out more information on uploading video game videos?
Quick glance at Peertube seems to deal more with educational entertainment materials and was wondering if there is somewhere that deals with a more entertainment focus?
Tldr:
Feel anxious and conflicted on persuing something I enjoy and sharing it and then feeling that I will ultimately go nowhere with it as I have in all likelihood developed learnt helplessness
End tldr
I want to write this as I am feeling anxiety over a a post I just made and the way I try and control it is to try and internalise and rationalise it.
One of the branches of the decrepit tree ahead:
My life it has been dotted with moments where I am ridiculed, taken advantage of or shown disdain, included in that is a poor self image and my insistence on maintaining integrity being seen as bad . In all those moments I have turned to video games to cope. I have tried to improve myself and I have made progress in some areas but still I am stuck in this very negative loop not going anywhere.
Currently I am disenfranchised in looking for work as my prospects continue to dwindle as I have all but abadoned my studied field as every attempt has been met with either disinterest or comments that make me feel I made a mistake in studying the field I did and the work I did find leads to dead ends as the culture of business in my country ensures that I will never advance in any established business by series of government incentive and without some element of nepotism.
I do not see a future in any work except maybe being some low level grunt whose work drive gets taken advantage of and exploited. Added to that I am stuck with student debt that just accrues interest.
For reference unemployment in my country from the latest I could find is 32,7 % of which I am on paper the least desirable work demographic. When really trying to think of something, the only avenue I see is self employment, however the only thing I feel confident in is video games.
I have been complemented on potential salesmen acumen which was harshly suppressed in the retail job I used to work in as wasting time.. Retail - I just could not take that environment as the company was like a toad in boling water placing more and more responsibility on my shoulders and then expecting an ever increasing higher standard while it took every opportunity to minimize costs- it expects a robot and that is the one thing I have been trying to avoid becoming
Sidetracked aside
And thus I get to the point of the story, I really want to make video game videos. I know it is a dead end as well to want to make a living in such a saturated market, and still I just want to make it more as an expression and possibly a stepping stone to share what I enjoy.
It is only thing I seem to take pride in that hasn't been taken advantage of( I guess it is a mental protective bubble)
However just asking for help on another instance gave me anxiety, ultimately I would love to make something from it but it really isn't the greatest motivating factor. I fear that what I would put out would be rubbish and waste my time and thus add on top my existing failure of not making anything of myself, made worse that I could spiral out that even something that I enjoy would be worthless.
I tried before to make something when I was in a slightly better situation where I had a working headset microphone but the more I reviewed it the more I would get upset at things from the quality of the video, to the sound of my voice, the production quality and the way I attempted to presented information, it remains as a private video that I feel even that is something I couldn't get right.
Realistically only thing I can currenly do is video game recording without any voice work and even that seems like I would be wasting my time. But still a part of me wants to do it to just do something other than the nothing that I am currently doing.
It feels wrong to want to do this as it will ultimately feel like just another failed project. I don't know what else to really do... looking for work seems pointless and I cannot think of any reasonable other work I can do as it most likely requires networking that I have virtually none of. I feel that i have worked myself into learnt hopelessness and anything I do is destined to fail.
Ultimately there is some deep underlining problems at work in me that have interwined and have amalgamated it something worse.
I realy hope that me throwing things out there like some sort of therapy session is alright. I really want to be a better person but I am carrying a crap- ton of baggage that I have held on to and feel guilt for being this way as people do have it a lot worse and I have this inability to do any better.
I am not sure if it the right place to ask, but I wanted to ask if there a platform that deals with video uploads, specifically gaming.
I am an absolute amatuer and probably will upload crap, but still if I could potentially upload stuff to get to grips with and build experience for myself I would like to please know.
An example would be for a test: I made some darkest dungeon boss fights videos, I still have on my mobile device, a while back for a friend to show them the game and in this case upload it to one of these instances I am asking about and get feedback and advice.
So it probably seems preachy posting it, but hey who knows could be a nice reminder that what you think is cool now will be probably ridiculed by future generations.
So I posted recently about something with Hollow Knight and how I was too fat fingered to do the white palace
Well before I wrote that I got as far as the room that has the secret wall to the Path of Pain. I resigned myself after going at the normal way it for hours and getting stuck there.
After writing , I tried to have a go at it again and reading guides to what to do, I finally got through it after an embarrasing amount of hours... now I know it is a skill issue I have with platformers and I was hating myself the whole way through while using a keyboard.
I hated doing it, felt like the game was going to break me but I carried on cursing the game for every inch of progress I made. I can acknowledge that the White Palace was well made ( although the saws and spear mechanisms will probably give me nightmares) , felt a bit overtuned on the timings, but again what do I know I am horrible with platforming in general.
If the normal white palace gave me this much trouble, then I will probably get aneurysms trying to do the path of pain and give respect to those that have will to do it
I don't wish to discourage anyone from playing the game though, my embarrasing amount of hours I put into completing the White Place is more an effect of me literally brute forcing my brain to get timings right and then playing a section at a time that the many sections on an obstacle becomes one set piece action when I stop thinking and let muscle memory take over
Tldr:
A.I. should held to the same ethical standard we hold humans, because humans will find ways to abuse A.I. use for potentially unethical means.
Mildly infuriated at the potential of A.I. manipulation by bad actors
Tldr end
I firstly want to say that I believe A.I. Development has a place to be worked on and has the potential for human growth but I also feel mildly infuriated at the potential money sink out-of-control corporations could develop.
I've seen arguments increase about A.I. and usually the heated arguments are very specific to a particular aspect. It does make me feel frustrated and I am trying to maybe express an aspect of A.I. use too I guess.
I am not trying to start any wars on the ethics of the use A.I. however I feel that there should be some form of ethics implemented. I guess that line of thought falls in with calls for regulation.
If I glance at how social media and games go when A.I. is used as means to figure out how to make the "factory must grow" it feels like things will only get worse as there will be an ever increasing drive for getting one more currency. The more the algorithm grows and refines the more lifeless things seem to get. All this with just "basic" A.I. models.
Efficiency increases, but what is the cost?
If I compare something like Reddit to Lemmy... Lemmy feels more "alive" because social interaction without the "corporate machine interface" trying to analyze you feels organic at the moment as you know there is a human and not a bot trying to make you engage.
My anger is not at the A.I., but more the way A.I. can provide unethical actors a means to push a questionable agenda. One can already see it with things like influencers and targeted advertising with human actors, and once said unethical actors figure out how to train and develop A.I. to successfully mimic a human I fear for the control said actors will push towards an unsustainable precipice towards a desired state of consciousness.
Maybe it is fear of a dystopian future, but I fear the reality of said future is more real if A.I. doesn't have ethics either.
If said topic is not in line within forum discussion, please let me know and I will remove it and if possible please direct me to a more appropriate instance
Thank you for you time
Calling out the corrupting influence and its effect
REPOSTED from:
https://lemmy.world/post/691964
**"Their is no curse in Elvish, Entish, or the tongues of Men for this treachery." **
Consider it a template and to avoid feeling dirty taking from Reddit image source.
To not repost from Reddit I will provide a source quote:
https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/511498-there-is-no-curse-in-elvish-entish-or-the-tongues
