Honestly that is me, I feel physically sick when i see people embarass themselves and I feel sick and cringe for them as a easy example but I always thought that was normal for everyone? You telling me that me feeling people's grief and getting sad with them cos I can only imagine how hard it must be if I put myself in their shoes? Is that not just empathy? If you feel it that intensly thats a different thing? Omg that's so wild.
Literally!! And to compensate I try to remind myself of that all the time and then completely ignore the very obviously social cues because I'm like "no just because they seem angry doesn't mean they are, I'm just assuming their feelings again!!!!" And omg it's such a chore to be me lmao.
Tone: not at all it's nice and I'm learning too!
Oh cool thank you for clarifying 
I'm really sorry but I'm not following this comment.
Have I fucked up or offended or insinuated something here?
I get the idea behind it, but in practice the message it's sending to everyone else is "get in line or else you'll be posting here if you want to keep using the site", which feels and functions like a social threat. It will be sending the anxiety of some comrades through the roof and it will be suppressing well-meaning but less well read comrades from speaking their minds in a way that will get any brainworms they have out into the open where they can actually be addressed.
Get out of my mind liquid!!
I think that's it, I recognise my whole post is "vibe" (I hope i made that clear) and without interviewing everyone we can't really know but hey at least we are talking about it! Yey look at me go!!
I don't know, tbh I'd never heard of that till just now. Maybe? It feels like me but also am I not just a bit of a narcissist main character hero complex who thinks she knows how people feel, assume she's right and runs with it and then talks about it? I also have negative confidence so I'll probably default to assuming it's a me problem. I worried about the above the whole time I was writing the post.
Full disclosure I think I did, like I don't find public displays fun but as I mentioned in another comment, self crit feels like a personal journey to me so that's probably the bias here that makes me feel how I feel about the comm and for me it just pops up in the local comms posts list occasionally and I'm like "oh God what did someone do now".
Yeah and honestly me talking stuff out in this thread is exactly that! It people genuinely feel it helps then who am I to say otherwise. I mentioned in a few other comments about how I worry having a signpost to reform kinda removes the personal initiative/drive/want to change that I think people need to actually self crit successfully but I recognise that's pure strawmanning.
That's fair, I think honestly if it helps then fair play. As long as people are feeling an expectation to do it then great. (She says like the inspector who came to check everything is up to board on hexbear).
Tone check: awwwh thank you and it's so nice to have chats on here, I'm not dependent on this site for socialising so it's no big if I leave but the idea of upsetting others and being seen as a bully makes me physically sick so it's nice to have chats on here without feeling scared that ill make a fool of myself.
See i totally agree with you there, when it first appeared I had the exact same thinking. But over time I think the very act of having it in a specific sub creates a spectator sport of people's worst moments.
Like if people wanted to self crit then making a post in c/chat raising what happened and having that growth and discussion there sounds great. But having specifically a sub for it feels like it's takes the organic growth and desire from the user to acknowledge their mistake away. Like instead of them going "I should go on c/chat and talk about this productively to address my mistake" it feels like a signposted expectation. Like have they learnt if they didn't decide for themselves? Like the initiative is important I feel. But that's just me literally strawmanning tbh.
Awwh I hate referencing soros like they aren't here but when I saw their post I didn't read it and think "good self crit" youre based again. I've seen that user a lot and they aren't a homophobe imo and it felt weird to see them essentially wearing that jacket to start a conversation BUT I'm not a gay man so it's not my place to decide that or make any comment on it so disregard my opinion there lmao. I dunno like with the incels from last week, I'd feel so bad if one of them felt compelled to self crit. I'd rather they make a c/chat and just have an organic conversation on that they've learnt on their own initiative not because c/selfcrit gave them the idea.
And I totally see your points too! I think I'll probably not engage with it myself but if it does help some positive growth in users then amazing and yes maybe it could be refocused to a more general critique of behaviour vs individuals unless it's specifically relevant to a personal experience?
I think you've put it a lot more concisely than my yapping in the post 💪
Like I waffle a lot cos I'm scared that if I don't try and vocalise every nuance I'll get dog piled so to be blunt and maybe a bit reductive: self crit doesn't feel like reform, it feels like public punishment/bullying behaviour/hazing and any catharsis from having confirmation someone has addressed their views feels soured by the public spectacle of it.
I think I'll do the same, I try not to block anything if I can help it and just subscribe to ones I like but yeah.
hopefully i can extend how long it is before i disappoint everyone 💪
Tone: genuine but also irony poisoned
Fr and without tone it's a nightmare trying to tell if someone's angry or being ironic etc. I fucking hate it.
I regularly worry everyone hates me online because I can't tell their tone 🙃
I might be way off the mark here but the more I think about self crit and my own neurodivergence (maybe I'm been a bit black and white about this) the idea of having a sub where people go to self flagrate over their mistakes to signal to us they are reformed?
I dunno chat.
I've lurked here a while and while some of the drama on here has been funny or sad or anger inducing, at no point did I ever feel satisfied reading a self crit post. I never felt "oh the sights clean now time to make an account".
I butted heads with incels on here immediately and while those people genuinely made me uncomfortable i don't wish to see a selfcrit from them. In fact it would frankly appear disingenuous and virtue signally to me.
Like if people get called out then it's on them to go do the homework, I don't expect to have to mark it though. The people I butted heads with about that incel thread got comments removed and temp banned. That seems reasonable to me. I'll die inside if I see a self crit on it.
I dunno I think there's a lot of neurodivergence on this site, myself included. We try to make it a safe space for everyone which is great.
I think what I'm worried is that a culture exists on here where if a ND makes a mistake, they may feel cut off and left out from a community they need for socialising and support unless they make a self flagrating post further signposting their mistakes.
There's a very niche and cool silly culture on this site. For a lot of ND people who don't have supportive irl group I can't imagine how it would feel to make fuck up and then feel locked out or lost this clique. I don't think making a new account is the answer either because people's accounts and history are representatives of who they are so to lose that for some might be like losing their identity as well. Maybe I'm projecting here but if I really embarrassed myself and didn't think people would talk to me as much on here because of it and that the only way to fix it was a self crit post. That's scary.
And then when i see self crit posts I feel like "damn nobody needed this, it feels uncomfortable to see this" like them getting dog piled and a temp ban wasn't enough punishment.
I dunno maybe I'm being too lib here but self crit feels for more a "hey irl I learnt this and here's my progress" vs "I upset someone on the bear site and im sorry please let me back in".
Like it felt maybe relevant when the admins/mods did some self crit on their behaviour but like they run the site so that kinda makes sense (not really).... or it might have if they all did it, so far I only saw like a few and even then it felt uncomfortable to read their comments.
Clearly they made a mistake and having to convince faceless terminally online people that they had the sites best interests at heart was sad to watch given they clearly did care cos of the graft they put into the site.
I dunno I don't see the point in this comm personally but I'm bored, my tamagotchi just died and I have always kinda thought this since the comm appeared so like yeah, let me know what I'm missing because I'm not the world and obviously my single view will be bias and full of holes or missing context.
Until then the sub feels a bit like !todd asking cheaters on fo76 to write an apology letter and it feels like a bit of a toxic power dynamic to have it on the site kinda looooming as an example of what happens to the naughty hexbears.
Edit: lmao I've deleted and undeleted this twice cos I'm scared of getting grief but then I'm kinda proving my point doing that so I'll be a big girl and leave it up.
Open source intelligence training? Does he mean being twitter addicted?
That doesn't count! 
Exactly, we'll have our own collapse when can't make money on money or something. Whatever London does.
Awwwh they're sending her back to the 
This is the worst ending 
Still we don't get poisoned by derailed trains on the reg which I'm always thankful for 
There's way better ones!
Place in the northeast called Dragonville.
That's cool! Eat shit fjwjxkakxmqnzwjxnd I'm fine okay!
Errgggghhhhhhhhhhhhhh they've been reframed as a legitimate group of the military now haven't they in the MSM?
"Oh they were nazis but they're so big now it's diluted any problematic viewpoints"
While their leader is sat their polishing his jackboots with a swastika shaped brush.
Omg a comment on YouTube said there's a radio station in the game that plays a race war song?
Are the devs that mask off, am I out the loop here? I've never played it.
"Short back and blow your fucking head off"
