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how did you deal with internalised transphobia?

It's something I'm really struggling with, thanks to it it feels like I'm obsessed with the idea of 'passing', like whenever I see other trans women who don't pass it gives me a little burst of dread, thinking that it's impossible to pass and I'd never be able to. That horrible fear of looking "like a man in a dress" like there's actually a problem with that outside of the societal expectation I've had slotted into my brain.

I know that you don't have to pass to be trans, and that all trans women are equally valid, and that what I really need to do is to let go of the idea of passing altogether, and just be happy being who I am on the inside.

I was just wondering if any of you girls have been through something similar, and if you had any advice. Xx

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People who can control their dreams - what is it like?
  • I assume so, it takes constant effort and practice to be able to do it at all though, that was over 10 years ago now when I was in my first year at university, I haven't had the time to dedicate to it since 😅

  • People who can control their dreams - what is it like?
  • I've only managed it once, flying around a featureless void, exulting in the feeling of control. Then a fistfight, again with a featureless opponent. It felt like controlling the dream to that extent and not waking up took a lot of brain power

  • Vocal training - Technical vs Practice?
  • I've started recently too, something I took to heart was one of Vee's videos on goals and timescales, she said for basically the first month your goal should just be to play around with your voice, go high, go low, sing in a higher pitch than usual, just have fun with it. I've been doing that and I've noticed it's easier for me to maintain that higher pitch now

  • Finally cracked and it's been a rollercoaster.
  • Same girl, I'm still totally hung up on passing, even though I know I'm still questioning whether I am trans or not. Even though cis people don't get euphoria when they see a picture of someone their age passing, or thinking about being referred to with she/her lol. it's gonna take time but we'll get there queen 👑

  • Rowing is a terf, how do I prove it?
  • I'm 6 minutes in to Shaun's video and it's already beyond reasonable doubt lol, while I kind of want to explain this to her myself (because she's super busy atm, so a 20 minute video will be a hard sell) but I doubt I'd do as good a job so I think I'll just send her a link. Thank you very much for the links!

  • Rowing is a terf, how do I prove it?

    So originally I was sceptical about the TERF claims on rowling (because I didn't want them to be true), I'd assumed terminally online people had decided something silly (as has happened before), but the more I looked at it and thought about it, the more I thought, "Ok, I don't really have proof here, but the odds are looking pretty fucking likely that she is, surely it'd be quite easy for her to just say something publicly like "trans women are women" and it'd be all over".

    The problem I'm having at the minute, is my wife still thinks that it's all probably something that's been blown out of proportion, and I can't explain to her why I'm not excited by the new Strike novel, or why I won't play the Harry Potter game. How do I prove to her that it isn't something that's been blown out of proportion and that Rowling really is a TERF

    16
    A little help with direct downloads

    So with a little help from the megathread I have a particularly Good website for finding Old Games, and it worked yesterday when I downloaded systemshock2, but now I'm getting a 403 forbidden message. Is this from the site itself? Or is my ISP (virgin) cucking me?

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    Ada you are our queen

    Don't let those shitheels from hexbear get you down. I joined in the 196wave but I've stayed because blahaj is the safe trans affirming space I need right now, and from what I've seen you've been a key voice in making that happen. Thank you for all the hard work you do!

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    InitialsDiceBearhttps://github.com/dicebear/dicebearhttps://creativecommons.org/publicdomain/zero/1.0/„Initials” (https://github.com/dicebear/dicebear) by „DiceBear”, licensed under „CC0 1.0” (https://creativecommons.org/publicdomain/zero/1.0/)VL
    Vlaxtocia [she/her] @lemmy.blahaj.zone
    Posts 7
    Comments 104