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Got some curveball thoughts on my mind, and need to get it out

After my post the other day, I made the decision to tell my ex that I couldn't be friends, not with her, or her family, that it would be too painful for me, that I would always be trying to be more than what it could be.

But today my mom came in throwing some curveballs. She says that my ex still loves me. The only reason I'm not disregarding this is because her and my ex were close. My mom misses her, maybe not as much as i, but like I do.

She says I shouldn't give up just yet, and if friends is all we can be then that's fine, but keeps urging me to take her to hangout. A detail I left out is that, the week prior to her telling me that romance wasn't an option, she rested her head on my shoulder, but I can't tell what she's saying by that. She even continued doing it after she told me no romance. Maybe I misunderstood her in that she meant no romance right now, my head is a mess, I thought writing this out would make it make more sense.

I came here first to write but I'm about to go ask some of my friends, so don't worry about me using Lemmy too much

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