Me, currently catless, watching all of you:

GET OP 10 CC OF CATS STAT

I'm also catless, but I do have this guy.
- I can’t speak for chinchillas, but rabbits are basically the cats of lagomorphs.
  
  In that they shed non-stop and will take over your life?
  
  He's certainly finicky like a cat. He lets you know when to pet him, barks at you otherwise. He's really soft and fluffy.
- Honorary cat.
  
  On a side note, a Chinese lady who owns chinchillas tells me that the symbols translate into English as "dragon cat".
  
  It’s looks like a cat if you squint.
- I approve

May the Cat Distribution System bless you with haste.
- I hope :3

I've got like 19 of them if you need to borrow a few. Any particular color preferences? (This isn't all of them)
- Sounds like you are one dropped cucumber from this.
  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VeFMdVIFsgs
- Holy crap that is amazing, I love them all!
  
  And they were all strays, or born from a stray. Already had 5 when I moved here where I am, then made friends with two stray moms who both had 4 kittens, making 15 total. Then another 3 toms came along. Then lastly around xmas a stray kitten (Pip, the grey boy in the top right) showed up at my door in -36c weather, so of course I brought him in.
  The only shelter around here has too many cats and will euthanize any brought in so I decided I'm going to do my best to give all these furry rodents love and a place to call home as best as I can, and here we are. It's a killer on the little money I have but they're safe and that's all that matters to me.
  Worst part is I'm attached to all of them now lol! I'm not even a cat person...er...wasn't.. I guess I am now.
- https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Animal_hoarding
  
  Ya I get it. I really do. I'm sure there's nothing I can say or do to change that opinion, but here's my choices...
  ignore the strays and let them die. (I live in Canada where the temps regularly go down to -30 to -40c. We have found other cats in the area that had frozen to death, the most recent being just a few months ago. That's a long story all by itself, but someone has been dumping kittens out here in the area. 5 more kittens were just found abandoned nearby several weeks ago, but a neighbor found a surrogate mother for them, and they're doing well)
  Bring them to the closest vet clinic (30 miles away in the closest town) where they will be euthanized.
  Help them and potentially find them homes if possible. (We are here) I have spent several thousand dollars getting them fixed, medication etc. Several that we've taken in have found new forever homes, and two I have now will also have a new home soon. (The people that want them are moving this summer but can't take them in just yet.)
  Aside from my original 5 that I don't let outside, most of them can and do go outdoors, weather permitting. (Ya I know, but they're basically farm cats) I live in a rural area and have a heated shed for them if needed.
  If that makes me a crazy cat hoarder, then I guess I am.

Catless Everbean.

No cats, but I do have 3 bunnies, 2 snakes, 2 spiders and a Leopard gecko.
Get a snake.

what zero pussy does to a mf
- Based

I lost my cat recently (was 19) so i feel this
- I understand, I still desperately miss my first cat, the smartest one I ever knew. Big handsome would come when called and knew who to go to when told "go see x".

Do you have a cat cafe or shelter/rescue nearby?
It's not the same thing, but it might quench your thirst somewhat
- Sadly no, just LLCs making a business out of it. Recently my buddy teased the shit out of me when we visited his friend, he had the most chill kitty and I spent the whole time hugging it :)

Don't worry the Cat Distribution System may be magnanimous and notice you!

Somewhere out there is a humanless cat.

Same man same. My housemate is allergic so that's a nonstarter atm. One day I shall rise again as a forever home to a kitty!

Foster! I got in real deep and about a week ago had 12 kittens from 4 litters, ranging in age from 2 days to 2 months. Finally found other foster homes for half of them, so I'm back to just 6 kittens from 2 litters now. Cats of all ages need foster homes! Some for just a few days, others for months, and most organizations will allow you to "foster fail" if you fall in love.