Trust me, no you don't. They're the I need my coffee before functioning people who refuse to get help for their ADHD, depression, and anxiety who think it's okay to be vile just because it's morning because that's how they had it as a kid.
Also, more than five hours of sleep helps. No, the three hour nap in the afternoon isn't the same as getting 6-8 hours of good sleep. 9-10 for some. Pretty sure it was genetics related last science knew.
I always changed the lyrics in my mind to "I want a girl with a short skirt and a long penis" because the mental image of a knob dangling below the hem of the skirt tickled me.