I was spanked as a child and am not okay, but to be fair, the childhood friends I keep up with were not spanked as children and also are not okay. Clearly we are in need of a third option.
I think the problem isn't that spanking is bad, I think the problem is that some parents just skip every step that leads to that being the only remaining alternative. The problem is that learning those strategies is not easy, parents don't educate themselves on proper parenting.
Yeah i was only spanked once as a kid and I’m pretty sure I deserved it. It’s not what fucked me up. It was the screaming and the slow withholding of love as I began to disappoint my father as I grew up that fucked me up.
I'm fine. Sure I sometimes wake up in the middle of the night terrified my dad's just gonna come through the door and beat me for no reason, but other than that I'm perfectly normal.