Maybe-un-doomy update (or, "A crab is making me post!")
Maybe-un-doomy update (or, "A crab is making me post!")
[Lie] Okay so, cowboycrustation says I have to post or he's gonna pinch me 🙀
I currently seem to be somewhat less doomed than previously seemed likely. Turns out a kind critter contacted another who called for helps and yet another popped up like "Hay, we have a room just for critters like that one!" So now I'm here in a lil room of a four-critter family's place, in neat lil area @.@ It's gonna be awkweird but I've got somewhere to be other than frozen Minnesota street doom and there are critters trying to help me so I've got at least some kinda chance of getting by up here. Am sleepy now but the looming threat of crabby pinchings and/or pinchy crabbings compels me to post something so here it is :P 😅
Lots of new experiences, too. Hanging out playing board games on the floor of my hotel room with my new friends, who didn't even know each other... that was neat 😅 Neat day. Better than the previous one. I think. I don't really know what happened that day. Anyway, some things are happenifying. Also it's kinda cold here 😅
Oh, the city looks super different than my initial impression. I suppose part of that is riding in a car versus riding a bus or train, but it looked much more familiar on the way here. Also being daytime probably helped a lot. My initial impression was like, dark and enclosed and often a lil bit lost, riding light rail with a bunch of smokers, trying to navigate Mall of America with eighty bazillion hunams in it @.@ D: 🙀 ... That sort of thing. Muchly different! Anyway, I'ma nap or something now. @.@ 😴
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Congratulations! Sorry I haven't commented/talked more, life has kept me a bit... lacking in brain-spoons. Tried to go get a microphone so I can talk to discord internet peoples (and maybe get some longer displayport and/or hdmi cables) but apparently micro center was closed for easter???
It's a relief to hear you're somewhere a bit more stable (I hope? It sounds like it). Totally agree on Malls, waaaay too people-y for me, I just hit my limit and disassociate until it's over, then completely crash for several hours.
You are absolutely, 100%, unquestionably worthy of being helped. You deserve friendship and affection of others, you deserve to have a place you feel safe, you deserve to have clean water to drink and nutritious food to eat. You deserve somewhere comfortable to rest. You deserve to have access to an environment that meets your needs both physically and mentally. You deserve access to medical care. You deserve access to opportunities to succeed in life.
On a more depressing note (to reply to one of your comments on a previous post), I am concerned that seemed to be minimizing your circumstances a bit.
Your parents called the cops to try to evict you illegally, likely with the full knowledge and acceptance of what having the cops called on you means for many, many people. Possibly explicitly wanting a bad outcome. That is not okay on ANY level. It is utterly reprehensible, and no better than SWATing in my eyes.
This is absolutely a circumstance warranting escape to a safer location.
I completely agree with you, Zorsith. It's easy to have survivor's guilt and feel bad about it and feel like you were making something out of nothing. But the problem is, retrospect can minimize things in one's mind. Getting out and surviving can lead to "oh, well I'm here in one piece so it must have not been that bad" but it was that bad.
I have a family member that has (and continues to add to) a hoarder house, minimizing issues scares me a bit. I'm talking massive two story house with basement, multi car garage, etc, with 1 foot wide paths between floor to ceiling piles of things. Maybe 2 small rooms that can be used, sleeping in a recliner because they can't get to their bed. "It's not that bad" can be horrifying.
My parent is a hoarder too, though it's not quite to the extent of yours. Mom's gotten slightly better about it. She keeps the bulk of her stuff in two office buildings (six rooms total), the entirety of our old house, and the attic at my grandma's house. It took years of throwing a hissy fit about how awful our house was and how I was embarrassed and ashamed to bring friends over (can relate to those one foot paths, always had to hop over piles of stuff to get to the bathroom) to actually get her to give away and move some stuff out. I get really triggered if I see a pile with a sheet covering it, gives me awful flashbacks. On the plus side, I can live in pretty much any condition because I grew up in such a rat's nest.
She'd always minimize that shit. Called me spoiled, said that since we didn't have a garage so the room in the middle of the house was like our garage (bullshit and who tf puts four year old bags of chocolate and piles of expired toiletries in their garage). Said that our house was so small and most people have more room for storage (the house isn't small at all. Three bedrooms and plenty of space). The hoarder gaslighting and minimizing is real. Hell, the emotionally unhealthy parent gaslighting and minimizing is real.
Thankfully it isn't a parent in my case, a grandma. None of it can realistically be given away as it is infested with fleas and other insects, and smells of cat urine and death. My parents won't go in anymore, I started refusing years before them. I'm told there are storage units as well 😔
I'm grateful my mother nipped that behavior in the bud the second my dad started displaying it.
That's depressing AF. I wish hoarders would realize how much their actions affect other people.
Best we can do is better ourselves, pay attention to the signs, and help others understand. It's a deep hole to fall into, and not everyone is able or willing to take the offered hand to climb out sadly
So true. Sometimes I hear that little voice in my head that's like "don't give this or throw it away...what if you need it for something."