5个月前

So professional looking it must be true

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62 评论

It reminds me of this:
- I unironically believe this; I have been to italy, and eaten authentic italian pizza.
  Fuck off with barely any cheese and no toppings. it tastes fine as a kind of fancy bread, but give me the fuckload of cheese and meat every time
  
  I couldn't disagree more. I've also been to Italy, specifically to Napoli, and just the dough alone is phenomenal, something between pancake and bread. Then the fresh tomatoes and mozzarella on top with the fresh basil leaves for the something extra - perfect balance, heaven in my mouth!
  I've also been to the US (west coast, Portland) and Jebus, that was terrible. First they don't give you a pizza but a slice of pizza, then it's reheated because they make a lot of it and can't sell it fresh. The toppings is dry ham and tasteless cheese, a ton of cheese, but just flavorless cheese. I tried in a couple of places there with practically the same result. Thanks, but no thanks.
  The Swedish pizza is probably what I would say is what you're talking about, tons of toppings and decent dough.
  Kebab pizza with french fries:
  
  Bro you went to Portland Oregon and got some shit new york style by the slice? You fucked up
  You should try
  Ken's Artisan Pizza
  A'pizza Scholl's
  Pizzeria Otto
  Pizza Thief
  The Star
  And that's just the best of the best that I've personally been to. Plenty of smaller places serving up phenomenal pies as well dotted everywhere. You only get by the slice of you're starving right now and have less than 5 bucks.
  Mid range but great
  Ollys Pizza
  Atlas
  Places that are over hyped.
  Baby Doll
  Sizzle Pie
  
  Swedish kebab pizza feels like it shouldn't exist, but it's honestly so good
  
  Oh I forgot to add one thing about the Italian pizza. I've eaten pizza in Rome too, and it was practically as terrible as in Portland.
  
  General rule of thumb: don’t go to tourist spots or where something has been invented. It’s worse than the knockoffs.
  Real "Sachertorte" from "Hotel Sacher" in Vienna is mindlessly overpriced and way worse than any one you can get at any small local bakery.
  Original "Carpaccio" from "Harry‘s Bar" in Venice is the same - extremely overpriced and just not good and not worth the money.
  I’ve had amazing "Tunbrötsrulle" at some little restaurant in Stockholm, I’ve forgotten the name, but they also had burgers on the menu.
  
  Well yeah you went to the wrong coast for pizza.
  
  I've also been to the US (west coast, Portland) and Jebus, that was terrible. First they don't give you a pizza but a slice of pizza, then it's reheated because they make a lot of it and can't sell it fresh. The toppings is dry ham and tasteless cheese, a ton of cheese, but just flavorless cheese. I tried in a couple of places there with practically the same result. Thanks, but no thanks.
  WTF, that doesn't sound even remotely correct. How much did you pay, $0.50? You got scammed dude. I'm from Texas which, afaik, is probably at the bottom of the list of "places you think of when someone says, 'pizza'" but I've had way better pizza than what you're describing. Hell, Pizza Hut is probably better than what you're describing lol. That sounds horrid.
  
  Portland
  Well there's your problem, the west coast has been doing strange things to their Pizza ever since that one cannuck thought using pineapples would excuse calling something a Hawaiian pizza without any spam
  
  There was a place I used to go that made a "Greek Pizza," which was basically a gyro on pizza dough instead of pita and with melted feta on top.
  Oh my god it was amazing.
  
  It sounds like you went to Little Caesar’s.
  
  I could find that kebab pizza a nice home in the trash lol. Looks nasty
  
  I just came back to Europe after a couple weeks in the US. The US was beautiful (travelled in the Rockies). I was surprised by the fact that I unironically would not be able to live there just because of the food. Everything was so drowned in cheese / sugar / unspecified ultraprocessed something that I had legitimate digestion issues the first week.
  "I would like an omelette please"
  "Yes sir, do you want eggs in that or just the cheese?"
  I had no idea I could miss just plain real bread as much as I did by the time I got back.
  
  Half the time it's not even normal sugar; it's high-fructose corn syrup...
  EDIT: Well over half the time.
  
  Getting just regular old bread for a normal price there is basically mission impossible.
  
  American bread is cake.
  https://www.npr.org/2020/10/01/919189045/for-subway-a-ruling-not-so-sweet-irish-court-says-its-bread-isnt-bread
  
  I try to buy it a day old and then freeze it. It kind of sucks
  
  Fortunately italian pizza isnt meant for fast food addicts
  
  I've never been to Italy, but my cousin grew up there for part of their childhood. They said "Italians invented pizza, America made it good"
  
  Yeah, no. They don't. Whoever told you that made that shit up or heard it from an american.
  
  American pizza and Italian pizza are two different animals that share the same name. They both have good, mediocre and shitty examples. I have had all three in both countries.
  As to which one I prefer? Ehhh depends on the day.
  Other countries also have their unique take on Pizza that I have tried and enjoyed. I had some in Spain and Brazil that were amazing yet very different.
  
  Go to Napoli and never have better pizza again because it just doesn't exist.
  
  It's also the last pizza you'll ever have /j
  Y̴̢̢̘̪͋̔ơ̶̦̝̊̊͝ư̢̗̳̾́͡ ͕͈̑͆́͘͡s̸̡̺̠ͨ͑͞ẽ̵̸̻͓ͣ̀ĕ̦́̚͟͡ͅ ̼̪̽̚͏̴̴N̵̫͖͗͗́͠a̢̳̲̓ͪ͝͞p̥̱ͥ͋́͠͏ơ̰̤̿̍́̕l̴̹̗ͨ̅͘̕i̟͔ͦͣ́͢͞ ̡̩̙͂̈́͘͜a̶̢̛͓̬̎͌n͎̲͊̍͏̢͜d̶̴͖̖̔̽͝ ̶͇̻ͪ͛́͠t̘͙ͮ̾́͟͜ḩ̵̛͙̜ͤͨe̴̢̡͕͉ͮ̓n̛̟͓ͯͥ҉̡ ̸̢͎̹̑̐͜y̬̪ͧ̓͏̴͡o̷̢͕͔̾̌͜ủ̵̼̘̅͠͝ ̴̝͍ͩ̿̕͟ď̸̵͔͈̆͟i̷̦̦ͫ̍͜͟ẹ̴̢̭ͭͬ͏
  
  Americans ☕
  
  bitch please.
- The worst pizza I ever had was when I was a kid and we took a trip to Italy and my parents got me some from a street vendor. The problem is it was American-style pizza and the Italians didn't know how to make American-style pizza.
  The second-worst pizza I ever had was St. Louis style pizza at an Imo's, which is the way to have it, and it is fucking foul.
  The third worst pizza I ever had was in Cozumel, Mexico. They put slices of tomato on it instead of tomato sauce, but did the rest of it the American way. Bleah.
  
  Cheddar, Swiss, and provolone with a shitton of sodium citrate. That's a combination I don't think I'd go for. Sounds like having American cheese on a pie.
  
  That's pretty much what it tasted like. Except on a cracker.

62 评论