The Onion @midwest.social DxK @lemmy.world 3 mo. ago

RFK Jr. Reminds Voters He Also Keeps a Monkey With a Handgun on His Nightstand For Self Defense If They Wanna Hear About That

thehardtimes.net RFK Jr. Reminds Voters He Also Keeps a Monkey With a Handgun on His Nightstand For Self Defense If They Wanna Hear About That

Independent Presidential candidate Robert F. Kennedy Jr. reminded voters that he also keeps a monkey with a gun next to his bed for self-defense if they’re interested in that story since they seemed to love the one about dumping a bear carcass in Central Park.

11 comments

I heard his story about dumping the bear corpse and holy shit... I cannot stand his voice. It's just irritating to listen to him talk about anything. Had no idea he sounded like that lol
- His voice is the result of a medical condition called spasmodic dysphonia.
  
  Damn that sucks....
I'm gonna need to see that monkey's gun license pls.
- The monkey has a right bare arm.
  
  Does he have a left bear arm?
- That monkey has a right to defend itself (and RFK Jr.) if someone breaks into their house to steal their bananas.
  
  RFK, Jr. is bananas enough for everyone.
It took me going to that site to realise this was satire. I just figured for RFK JNR this headline made perfect sense.

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