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Funny @sh.itjust.works

The Picard Maneuver @lemmy.world

7d ago

When you marry someone who thinks ahead

54 comments

Going by the spillage, that stuff is already fuckin rancid as hell
- Nah, it's just crunchy.
  
  crunchy and 'spicey'
  
  Crusty

I think I'm overpaying for peanut butter
- buying in bulk is definetly cheaper

So you're going to die this year? Because peanut butter has a way shorter expiration date than he seems you think. Though if you eat that much peanut butter in a year, so do y'all.
- That hing on their hands... It doesn't look like a spoon.
- Would old peanut butter kill ya? Perhaps that's what they mean by "a lifetime supply"?
  
  If your taste buds are working, it'd be pretty difficult to eat enough rancid oil to kill yourself.
  
  Besides anything killing you insufficient quantities, or if you end up being trapped ankle deep but head first in of that barrel, probably. It's been open so there's a good chance that something got in there. Botulism will kill you really good.

Peanut butter may last 6–24 months unopened, or 2–3 months once opened. Natural peanut butters lack preservatives and may last several months unopened, or up to a month once opened.
Even if you have unlimited temperature controlled bugproof storage space this is a terrible idea
- It's only a 2 month supply
- I don't know what you think is going to make it spoil at 0-30K. (Maybe the freezing could destroy some organic compounds) A few hours in the oven and it should be fine.
  
  By temperature controlled I was thinking like, a root cellar, not negative 400 degrees

"What's for dinner?"
"Peanut Butter."
"Of course."

I have to imagine this peanut butter was intended to feed animals, probably for hunting.
So it isn't even particularly sweet and processed at a lower standard than the stuff the husband was used to. But what do I know, maybe he always intended to bait hogs with it.
- Added sugar to peanut butter is an affront to the mighty peanut. Just grind that shit pure and smack it in your mouth like nature intended.
  
  Damn straight. Peanut butter is the best tasting food in existence and adding sugar to it is wildly insulting.
- probably for hunting.
  Who needs a machine gun? For hunting.
  Who needs $600 worth of peanut butter? For hunting.
  Take my peanut butter away?
  From my warm sticky hands!
  
  Am I weird for wanting a machinegun that shoots hogs at peanut butter?
- it's on /r/AmIOverreacting, i think it's safe to assume the story is false

My answer depends heavily on whether it’s chunky or creamy
- finally, someone asking the right questions

Probably 2/3 of the way to racid already, smh
- Racid? Do you mean rancid?
  
  He meant racist.

This is probably like... number one on the "my partner might be a doomsday prepper" checklist.

That's not nearly enough for a lifetime
- A single jar is more than enough for a lifetime.
  
  Especially, if you're allergic.
- If you ate all of it at once it would definitely last a lifetime. Especially if you have a peanut allergy!

That gonna go rancid before the first barrel is emptied.

Then you find out rancid PBJs are 50% off this week.

Like that guy who bought 40 pounds of parmesan for 10 bucks.
- Can you imagine how buff the Olive Garden server's arms would get?

he’s planning a murder/suicide involving peanut butter

Is this some 'The Price Is Right' reveal? As a prepper, I bid $10,001!

So potentially I can have a PB bath for around 100$? Neat
- Hi Bixby, can you bathe in peanut butter?

What a deal

Can those containers hold hundreds of pounds of... anything?
- Yes, that's why they use them.
- Those particular drums are usually used for solids, but with a plastic liner inside they can be used for viscous liquids as well. I wouldn't fill one with a low viscosity liquid, you'd want a plastic or metal drum for that.
  Those drums in the picture are really badly filled as well, I'd have rejected them if they'd turned up to the warehouse looking like that back when I was doing QA.
- it couldn’t hold hundreds of pounds of air… or of hydrofluoric acid

Now do it with other food like milk.
- "Honey, I bought a cow!"
  Yeah, perfect.

Going to be honest. I was looking into sources of bulk organic goods and saw that Eden Foods sells 55 gallon barrels of soy sauce for roughly $3,000. Far beyond justifying for any pay I've ever had, but for how much soy sauce I go through it is tempting that it's there.
But then again I opted not to buy anything from that company because the founder is very openly Catholic, and I don't know what their political leanings are. I'd rather not accidentally support another Hobby Lobby if I can avoid it.

54 comments