You're fine if you can cheat but you need to cheat.
If it's the kind of urine test where they let you go into a bathroom and wait outside, you can order some synthetic urine or find some in a head shop maybe.
I hate this puritanical shithole where people can be one drink away from alcohol poisoning on the clock while I lose a job for doing something on my own time
Death to America
I guess my only saving grace might be the fact that my metabolism is insane but that’s a long shot
If it's not for probation I'm not sure its even legal for someone to watch you piss, while a urine pouch is probably the most sure fire route there are drinks that will purge your system of metabolites. Goto a local head shop and ask for a detoxification drink, do not say it's for a drug test or they won't sell it to you.
I've never used real piss. Sub Solution's maker sells a belt with a small tube and a reservoir that's gravity operated which you may want to check out, the "incognito belt". I have no idea what their "spike urine additive" is meant to do but maybe that's worth checking out...
Nothing that hasn’t been said. Buy the fake pee, keep it around if you don’t end up needing it. It works, and you just put it in your pants so it’s not in your pockets.